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Teen Poetry #7
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December Song
| Teen Poetry #7 |
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December Song |
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smalltownmind Junior Member
since 2003-10-24
Posts 21 |
random thoughts in the middle of the night can come out quite well if you try lol. December Song Breathing in the air is cold and i'm feeling so unknown without you, I can't move... and I know that I am alone... Myst is falling in the air like tiny snowflakes in your hair the sun is gone and winter is here and in my dreams you're standing there In front of me, but i can't see... that i can't carry my heart that far. Think back a while, you used to smile... and i just can't wait for December. The red-orange glow you used to love has faded away and jaded our love you've gone so high, you can't see me and i'm so low, i'm beneath you and me... December was always our song you were there but LOVE WAS ALWAYS GONE... January came adn made me bitter now fall is back and i remember You were there for me, i didn't reach... now i can't hide my favorite scars i can't think why, i made you cry now i just can't wait for December... Remember... walking in the snow, it's not that long ago. November... was something new, i'm drowning in thoughts of you. i wrote you that Novemeber song... i would play and you never sang along Summer is falling and Spring is calling you away to yesterday....yesterday is December. "if you want me back...you're gonna have to ask." |
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| © Copyright 2004 Eric Githens - All Rights Reserved | |||
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young_blood Senior Member
since 2003-09-19
Posts 1115Indianapolis, IN |
very very good. i enjoyed this alot. the only thing that i didn't like was that you switched rhyming patterns. other than that it was good. -alex |
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smalltownmind Junior Member
since 2003-10-24
Posts 21 |
ahh yeah, i should probably have mentioned that this is a song for my band, so i guess if you hear it the rhythm change isn't that noticable. but thanks a lot. "if you want me back...you're gonna have to ask." |
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Lexy Senior Member
since 2003-01-28
Posts 1038California |
"i can't hide my favorite scars" neither can I. I loved this. I liked how you went through the months explaining feelings and such.. great writing. ~Lex |
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