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Teen Poetry #7
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falling apart
| Teen Poetry #7 |
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falling apart |
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lauren03 Member
since 2002-01-04
Posts 64oh, usa |
I crumble to the floor in all of this despair others watch and show they truly care I fight back the tears as I run for the door I'm so sorry for what I did before I look at you as I run past for a second there is a glance and All at once I remember there is no chance I screwed up once and and then again You hate me now, you won't even let it show Its been days since I heard your voice All I was told was I made my choice Go to him you said, leave me alone I don't know why I did it why I went there at all That call I never received could have changed it all but with a bit of fate it was already too late Now its over, you can't even relate I know this shouldn't have happened for some reason I couldn't have stopped it I sit here now alone wanting to be with you Your gone forever, I broke you in two something I promised I'd never do |
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| © Copyright 2004 lauren - All Rights Reserved | |||
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young_blood Senior Member
since 2003-09-19
Posts 1115Indianapolis, IN |
well, it looked to me that you changed rhyming patterns in the poem, am i right? if so, thats not a great thing to do. the poem itself was good aside from that. |
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kissa~rachelle Senior Member
since 2003-11-27
Posts 988nowhere special |
Wow, i like this. It does sound as though you made the wrong choice doesnt it? But maybe you didnt. I dont know, I have always beleived that things happen for a reason, and i beleive that there is a reason behind this. Even if it doenstall work out how you want it too, it will work out nevertheless. hugs and kisses!  ~kissa~ |
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