Teen Poetry #7 |
Laced with Brilliant Smiles and Shining eyes |
Sweetest Sorrow X Member
since 2004-01-19
Posts 146From a cradle to a casket |
A big cold frost takes all the Attention and gives a Big show gets all Eyes as the disease comes silently subtle and unseen Kills all the eyes That stare in the eyes of the sweeping frost What has more effect? the frost that captures? or the disease that kills? I believe that lovers should be tied together and thrown into the ocean in the worst of weather and left there to drownin their innocence |
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Lexy Senior Member
since 2003-01-28
Posts 1038California |
I like this one so much. "Kills all the eyes That stare in the eyes of the sweeping frost" Perhaps change eyes to something else. too repeatative. |
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