»
Archives
»
Teen Poetry #7
»
My way
| Teen Poetry #7 |
|
My way |
|
|
bANAna New Member
since 2003-12-20
Posts 8Slovenia,Celje |
How was I supposed to know, you could ever hurt me so. When I look into your eyes, I see a boy who never cries, but I'm crying 'cause of you. How could that be true? You're not supposed to mess my mind, and that's my mistake, I shouldn't have let you into my heart, it's not the one that has to break. |
||
| © Copyright 2003 Ana - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
peachesNcream Senior Member
since 2001-08-21
Posts 513Ocean Of Tears |
This was a good choice for your first post. Good work, this kinda hit hard. I'm looking forward to reading more of your work! ~Jess  "Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go." -Herman Hesse |
||
|
bANAna New Member
since 2003-12-20
Posts 8Slovenia,Celje |
I'm falling, life is just slipping away now I feel there's nothin' more to say Nothing more to do, there's no me, here's only you. |
||
|
bANAna New Member
since 2003-12-20
Posts 8Slovenia,Celje |
I start to scream, why isn't all just a dream, crying my heart out, I just want to go somewhere and shout. But all I do is sit, sit in my boring corner, trying not to fit, self- pitty myself too, see all in black 'cause of you. |
||
|
bANAna New Member
since 2003-12-20
Posts 8Slovenia,Celje |
Big mess inside my head, big hole in my heart..I'm dead. I'm not here anymore, behind all of my worries, I'm closing the door. Don't want them here with me, empty is what I want to be. Without a single thought, I wasn't yet prepared to fought, to fought them back, strugling with my mind, these worries are breaking my neck, my fears seem to be even underlined. |
||
|
bANAna New Member
since 2003-12-20
Posts 8Slovenia,Celje |
Hate my life, all I see now is a killing knife, I don't know what has left for me to make it woth, to make it through with south it my heart, instead of a north. Is there anything at all, that wouldn't make me fall. That wouldn't crash me back down again and again, and make me lost, that wouldn't breake me into pieces, and wouldn't make me sad for any cost. I feel so numb inside, I just want to close my eyes and hide, hide away from problems, hide away from love too, hide away from anything, that even seems like you I just want to live, I don't want to fit, |
||
|
bANAna New Member
since 2003-12-20
Posts 8Slovenia,Celje |
No problems, no good advices, no silly looks, no devestating smiles. No fairy tails, no driving me nuts, no false hopes, no stars on bright nights. _____ It's all just a lie, but I'm suprised it doesn't make me wanna cry, it was a game that now I know you refuse, and I was the one that had to lose. It is starting to go cold, once again I'm alone on that road million miles away from others, here's only me, coming towards the end, only darkness I see. ____ You lied, I cried, you said, we died. Through the rain, I see the pain, you always knew, how to drive me insane. _____ |
||
xShUgArHiGhx 
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
first off.. WELCOME TO PASSIONS!!! You definately are a great poet. Your poem gets stronger and stronger with every bit you add to it..why dont you put it all together and submit it as a new poem? Great job and looking forward to reading more from you!! P.S.-Check your e-mail for a special greeting! Standing on the edge of the world |
||
|
young_blood Senior Member
since 2003-09-19
Posts 1115Indianapolis, IN |
didn't like them. everyone on this forum writes like this. make yours stand out. -alex now im alone, but not lonely like before |
||
|
bANAna New Member
since 2003-12-20
Posts 8Slovenia,Celje |
Thank you for your responses. I know that I write very much like others, but I think that this is teen poetry and many teenagers think and feel very close a like. I can't write something that I don't feel, though I think my poems in slovenian language are more deep *or smth  *.And I know that my english is not so good, but I come from Slovenia - non-english speaking country . Lol..so...I hope you'll understand me And tnx 4 your email:* It made my day I was very happy when I saw all of your comments Anyways...Have phun all |
||
|
kissa~rachelle Senior Member
since 2003-11-27
Posts 988nowhere special |
I like them, and your right, it is very hard for me to write about something unless i feel strongly about it too. In poems, and other things. I agree that you should try and make yours stand out, but i dont think you should stop writting the way you do, or about what you do. I really like this and just because it is about the same stuff, it doesnt mean that it isnt good. Teens generally go through the same stuff, that is why their poems are about the same things in general, like you said. I hope to hear more. ~kissa~ p.s., I also agree that you should put all of the poem together and submit it again. |
||
|
bANAna New Member
since 2003-12-20
Posts 8Slovenia,Celje |
Hey all, it's been a while now  Falling deep down. Down in black. Imagination. My heart is slowly killing me. The sun is shining, but it's so shallow. So out of my perspective. And you... |
||
|
*Alli4000*
since 2004-03-21
Posts 3188The World of Poetry |
I liked your poem, it was great for your first post. The rhyming was really good considering that you don't know english very well. Keep up the good work and I can't wait to read more! |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
