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Foreverone8783
Junior Member

since 2006-05-29

Posts 24
Illinios

0 posted 2006-06-05 06:12 PM

Come join me now
Let me tell you a story
One about pain and heart break
Not happiness or glory

Let me start by saying
This story doesn’t end
With rainbows and sunshine
But two hearts that won’t mend

Everything started out perfect
But then the real world cut in
They were so happy together
Isn’t that how it always begins

Sunsets and long walks
Romantic kisses in the rain
A time filled with love
But then followed by pain

They drift father from each other
Their love fades from within
They’re left feeling empty
And their happiness is dim

Both afraid to be alone
They won’t break apart
They wish they could go back
And wish for a fresh start

But life doesn’t work that way
There’s no way to rewind
There’s no way to get it all back
Their souls no longer intertwined

But they stay together
It’s the only way they know
They once loved each other
But that was so long ago

So they stay together
Though no longer in love
They think about their past
That they were once part of

So that’s how it ends
They are still together
Living a life
Of what they were

Afraid to find love again
Afraid it will end they same
They both stay together
With nothing to gain

So I now say “the end”
And the story halts
Together forever
Its their default

bekahlekah45
Senior Member

since 2006-03-14

Posts 533

1 posted 2006-06-06 12:56 PM

im not sure what to say? umm i like it...its like a bittersweet type of thing? umm idk!

stargal
Senior Member

since 2006-03-06

Posts 1352
OR USA

2 posted 2006-06-06 09:25 AM

Okay, well, I liked this a lot but i'm afraid that some of it just repeated itself to much for me. I mean, it used different words, but kept saying the same things. Like how they still lived together though no longer inlove. It became a little bit repetitive after awhile, no offence.

I did like how you started this poem out though, in story form kinda like, yet it still had good flow, which was cool...

I really liked this poem though, and i hope to see more from you

@-->---

Foreverone8783
Junior Member

since 2006-05-29

Posts 24
Illinios

3 posted 2006-06-07 12:53 PM

I know its not the best poem, but I was stuck in a hotel all day Saturday while my fiancee was at his drill (he's a Marine) and I wanted to write but it wasn't really coming out as good. This is what I ended up with! It was kinda just an im bored I think I'll write a poem, poem.

cherrys_rule
Member

since 2006-03-18

Posts 442

4 posted 2006-06-13 06:35 PM

I actually like this one. It reminds me of everything in my life with this guy that i have known all my life, and we finally decided that we should finally start dating.
Good write i can relate to this.

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