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Teen Poetry #7
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Just a game...
| Teen Poetry #7 |
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Just a game... |
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CrAzI_bAbI_cHiKa Member
since 2003-07-16
Posts 248
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It was supposed to be just a game High school? It's a pile of lies, harbored in the souls of many, Where truth is desired desperately but image is required. Yeah, to noone was it just, a game. The heavy breathing, patient parents the waiting crowd... all part of the supposed game, while in a closed room all alone you pray. Not for an score of 11-2, or a hattrick, or for even a penalty-less exhibition. but for the happiness of hundreds, the love of thousands, the approval of millions. A hockey game that would determine your future your happiness your life. To some, it was just a game... maybe to those in, say, Wisconsin, or Nevada. But here in Boston, it could never be just a game. When I'm good, I'm very good. But when I'm bad I'm better. |
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| © Copyright 2006 Keryn - All Rights Reserved | |||
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stargal Senior Member
since 2006-03-06
Posts 1352OR USA |
Hey, I don’t know much about hockey, but I thought this was a neat poem! There is a lot of imagery in this poem. I didn’t think this one was meant to be a rhyming poem, so I won’t say anything on that… if I’m wrong please correct me! I loved how you included everyone in this poem, the players, the parents, crowd, everything… This isn’t like anything I’ve seen posted in the teen section, and that’s good, I think that might be why I enjoyed this one so much. It’s something fresh, some new ideas. My favorite lines would have to be, “It's a pile of lies, harbored in the souls of many, Where truth is desired desperately but image is required.” . Very nice job, I can’t wait to see more! @-->--- |
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latteaddict213
since 2006-02-17
Posts 523Colorado |
It is fresh. I've never read anything like this on teen form either. Its very good. Is it suposed to be a ryhming poem? I can't critique it. It very nice. All your work is though. Jessica |
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