Teen Poetry #7 |
Life |
curiouse Member
since 2006-03-21
Posts 277england |
Life If I ever had the chance to go back in time then I wouldn’t. I wouldn’t because I can’t make anything wrong or right I do not believe in a destiny nor a previous or an after life I do not believe in science and I do not believe in spirit. So what am I? I am curiose; I am a blank canvas for you to work on I want to believe but I don’t, I keep my feelings to myself Because I do not believe. I tell my self, my family, and my friends that I am devoted to my religion Or am I just curiouse? do I not want to explore this world, do I not want to make my own life by making my own twisted decisions if you set goals for me, tell me what to believe, tell me what is wrong or right and how live my life , then is it really my life? Or is it yours, am I a follower of this world? Do I not want to be a leader? So why would I want to go back in time, so people can make my life for me. I am not me I am not my own person I am what you have made me into, I am what this world has made me into and I do not like it. Or is it that I have made myself into what I am today? Am I two people? Am I a follower on the outside and a dreamer on the in? Or is everyone… |
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© Copyright 2006 whatever you want it to be - All Rights Reserved | |||
stargal Senior Member
since 2006-03-06
Posts 1352OR USA |
Confusing! You might want to consider adding stanzas… I enjoyed this though! It was really deep, had some amazing questions in it. I’m not sure what “curiose” means, unless you’re trying to say curious? I’m not sure if you’re a rhythm person, but the poem doesn’t always flow, actually I couldn’t really find a good rhythm. Good job though! My favorite line has to be, “I want to believe but I don’t, I keep my feelings to myself Because I do not believe” I can really relate to this. Thanks for sharing! I look forward to seeing more of your posts. @-->--- |
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curiouse Member
since 2006-03-21
Posts 277england |
thanx stargal and yes i did mean curiouse, curiouse |
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firy New Member
since 2006-04-07
Posts 8florida |
I liked the poem alot but it flowed only in certain parts however though the poem says things I seemed to wonder in my head everyday but never really can answer thanks, firy chief |
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latteaddict213
since 2006-02-17
Posts 523Colorado |
Stanzas would be great for this. It doesn't flow that well in some parts. I don't really know how you can change that but I'm telling you any ways. yeah I was kinda confused about the curiouse word but its all cleared up now thanx. Jessica |
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Merik New Member
since 2006-04-10
Posts 6 |
I think it's good the only religion in life you can believe is the one of experience meaning that only by living life and experiencing it can we be our own person. Our experiences and our acquaintances make our personality and our beliefs. |
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the_girl_next_door Senior Member
since 2006-02-26
Posts 591USA |
THIS IS AMAZING..!! nothing more i can say.. great job.. ~Heather Desire nothing except desirelessness. Hope for nothing except to rise above all hopes. |
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Free_Spirit07 Member
since 2006-01-29
Posts 222The middle of my mind! |
this is VERY interesting gurl! see i liked it a lot a few words could have been added so it makes more sence. but the over all flow was awesome. if you feel like people have choosen your paths through life your wrong they may have shown you or said what paths you should go down but your the only person that can walk down them...sorry if it sounds harsh. and i know that you know that you do know that there is a God and you can chose to believe or you can not! sorry again if this sounds harsh just simply saying hugs from me byeebyee x0x0 |
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latteaddict213
since 2006-02-17
Posts 523Colorado |
oops didn't mean to post anything here so now I will just apologize. I apologize. tata |
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