Teen Poetry #7 |
Shoulder |
the_girl_next_door Senior Member
since 2006-02-26
Posts 591USA |
I can hear it day and night, I see it in my dreams, this burden on my shoulder, there forever, so it seems. I remember what was said, the actions that occured, I wanted to give up, a path with vision blurred. The memories stay with me, and some I wish I could forget, but I'd have to erase all of them, and I know I'd soon regret. I know that it's all wrong, this game of sad pretend, but the only thing I want from it, is a quick and sudden end. I can't hold out on my own, without a shoulder to lean, so right now I'm all alone, and exception to "No 'I' in team. I won't cry for it doesn't matter, because no one else can hear... I'll just wait til I can match, a shoulder with a tear. Desire nothing except desirelessness. Hope for nothing except to rise above all hopes. Want nothing & you will have everything. [This message has been edited by the_girl_next_door (03-01-2006 10:15 PM).] |
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© Copyright 2006 Heather Sullivan - All Rights Reserved | |||
Free_Spirit07 Member
since 2006-01-29
Posts 222The middle of my mind! |
but the only thing I want from it, is a quick and sudden end. I can't hold out on my own, without a shoulder to lean, so right now I'm all alone, and exception to "No 'I' in team. I won't cry for it doesn't matter, because no one else can hear... I'll just wait til I can match, a shoulder with a tear. i can so relate to this very very well....it seems like just yeah the poem said it all x0x0 |
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latteaddict213
since 2006-02-17
Posts 523Colorado |
" I know that it's all wrong, this game of sad pretend, but the only thing I want from it, is a quick and sudden end. I can't hold out on my own, without a shoulder to lean, so right now I'm all alone, and exception to "No 'I' in team. I won't cry for it doesn't matter, because no one else can hear... I'll just wait til I can match, a shoulder with a tear." This part just really hit me hard. Wonderful. I think that there was only one misspelling. And thats always good. Nice write Jessica |
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the_girl_next_door Senior Member
since 2006-02-26
Posts 591USA |
Hey thanks for the replys and again.. the spelling error. I guess I get to typing so fast that I don't even look at the screen. Guess i need to learn to proof read. he he thanks again ~Heather Desire nothing except desirelessness. Hope for nothing except to rise above all hopes. |
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kissa~rachelle Senior Member
since 2003-11-27
Posts 988nowhere special |
this was beautiful. i can imagine a girl leaning on a shoulder bawling in the end. and throughout the poem i see a girl sitting in her room writing. idk. this was really good. *karissa* I ask why, but in my mind, |
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the_girl_next_door Senior Member
since 2006-02-26
Posts 591USA |
thanks Karissa.. now that you mention it.. even I can see it in my head. ~Heather Desire nothing except desirelessness. Hope for nothing except to rise above all hopes. |
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helenadepp Member
since 2006-01-16
Posts 59durham, england |
There is a beautiful flow to this. The rhyming is perfect. I liked this alot. |
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ShelbyLynn13 Member
since 2006-02-15
Posts 73US, Colorodo |
wow that is a really neat poem! nice write! ttyl every one is special in their own way!!! |
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