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Teen Poetry #7
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Christioned
Member
since 2004-01-15
Posts 93
Huddling in the dark

0 posted 2005-12-02 05:36 PM



A chipping mask
with a worn and faded smile
my painted masquerade breaks apart
then melts away
as one more tear falls today.

Without my mask I am naked
and exposed to this world
they see the pain they cause me
for I wear it on my sleeve
as one more tear falls today.

You all mock me
and make fun of what's under the mask
you are all the reason why I wear it
you're the reason why I say
as the tears fall today.

So chip by chip
and layer by layer
a new mask is created
one that is stronger than before
all as the tears fall today.

"It's my curse to constantly be in battle with Him."- Me

© Copyright 2005 Andi Rex - All Rights Reserved
AtLsHawTy17
Member
since 2004-09-07
Posts 60
IL,
1 posted 2005-12-02 07:40 PM


wow the emotions in this is deep,i love the write but its sad

Too late to cry, you're gone... why should I cry, you can't wipe the tears dry, so what am I to do? I need to be with you....-Me

* shining star*
Member
since 2005-06-29
Posts 76
PA,USA
2 posted 2005-12-04 09:47 AM


I really like  this piece, keep it up!

-Smile, it's not a sin.

Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
3 posted 2005-12-04 01:07 PM


Christioned~
This is a perfectly executed emotional purge~

By the way
Happy, happy
Happy Birthday~


*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*No matter what I search for ...
let me know when it is LOVE that I find*~ <))><

Email -       noles1@totcon.com       

Christioned
Member
since 2004-01-15
Posts 93
Huddling in the dark
4 posted 2005-12-04 08:35 PM


Dearest Marge,
Thank-you, thank-you, and oh, thank-you. Your kind wishes are very much appreciated. And in taking your advise I'm bringing the fun to me.

"It's my curse to constantly be in battle with Him."- Me

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
5 posted 2005-12-04 08:52 PM





HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHRISTIONED!!

DejaEntendu
Member
since 2005-12-06
Posts 82
Pennsylvania
6 posted 2005-12-06 11:53 AM


I really enjoyed your poem. It's easy to relate to, because everybody has something about themselves hidden from others, and it just gives you asense you're not alone. Well written.
sandgrain
Member Elite
since 1999-09-21
Posts 3662
Sycamore, IL, USA
7 posted 2005-12-07 05:10 PM


Your piece made me want to cry.  Sometimes I think people are hiding things because they feel they won't be accepted if truth be known.  However, amazingly, we may be hiding the same thing someone else is and because we hide it, we miss the chance to be understood and close.  I'm e-mailing some experiences.

Perhaps the biggest sadness is that we feel we have to hide things to be acceptable.

littlemiss
Junior Member
since 2006-02-26
Posts 16

8 posted 2006-03-02 04:12 PM


This poem nearly made me cry aswell, and i think the repetion has a really good effect.
It's like you've taken out your heart and poured it into words! its very effective

the_girl_next_door
Senior Member
since 2006-02-26
Posts 591
USA
9 posted 2006-03-02 07:41 PM


The only thing I can say about this poem it Great job! I loved it.

~Heather

Desire nothing except desirelessness. Hope for nothing except to rise above all hopes.
Want nothing & you will have everything.

latteaddict213
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2006-02-17
Posts 523
Colorado
10 posted 2006-03-04 11:52 PM


I loved it! wonderful job and happy birthday i guess.

           Jessica    
              :)
    Character is what you
      do when you think that
         no one is loking--??

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