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hunnie_girl

Member Elite

since 2006-06-18

Posts 2567
Canada

0 posted 2006-07-01 04:00 AM

I know how your feeling,
as i feel the same way,
I wish my heart was healing,
and the path i take leads the right way,

I try to be so unlike me,
so you don't love me anymore,
it's my mistake for saying goodbye now i see,
i was the one who walked out your door,
and wanting you back just comes easily,

I want you to love me as i love you,
and hearing your voice makes me feel bad,
theres nothing I can do,
it's the first time i've seen you this sad,
and i'm huting inside too,

so try to forgive me and understand,
i did what i felt was right,
and now it's time to say goodlbye.

A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your
heart.

latteaddict213

Senior Member

since 2006-02-17

Posts 523
Colorado

1 posted 2006-07-01 07:59 AM

Cool. Like the way you ended with "Time to say goodbye." that's awsome. I can't really relate to how you felt when you wrote this. I don't know how bad your situation was or is, but if you ever need to talk. I'm here for ya. Your poem flows so well. And is very organinzed. Nice job.

                  Jessica

stargal
Senior Member

since 2006-03-06

Posts 1352
OR USA

2 posted 2006-07-01 12:46 PM

Hey hunnie_girl,

It’s about time you posted something! I’ve been waiting and waiting to read one of your poems and to welcome you to pip! Let me tell you that all of your comments on the other poems are much appreciated by me, thank you so much.

As for your poem? It’s amazing! I loved it, the way it was written, the stanzas, the length, the wording, emotions in it were all so good. When I started reading I must admit that I thought “oh no, another love poem”, but you made it interesting to read with from the first stanza to the last. I liked that… and the ending stanza was awesome in my book, I loved how you said, “so try to forgive me and understand, I did what I felt was right” something about that part really stands out to me. I don’t know why, maybe I once thought something like that, said something like that, but I know that I can relate well to those two lines…

Thanks a bunch for sharing this poem with us, I can’t wait to see more of your poems in the near future!

@-->---

spaz02
Member

since 2005-06-28

Posts 74
USA

3 posted 2006-07-01 04:32 PM

this is good..i like it..relationships are hard..u just want it to b so perfect but then it messes up...i kno how u feel..but i like this poem..

For every drop of my blood that falls
is because of you!
~myself~

hunnie_girl

Member Elite

since 2006-06-18

Posts 2567
Canada

4 posted 2006-07-02 01:34 PM

thanks everyone i wasn't sure i liked the ending b/c it was rushed but then the when i reread it, it didn't seem so bad. I also noticed i made a typo on the last word goodbye* or at least i think i did.....but yeah i finally posted one of my poems my first one too. but i kind of made it up the spot.
*hunnie*

A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your
heart.

tapper798
Member

since 2003-07-20

Posts 353
My own world

5 posted 2006-07-06 02:50 PM

First, welcome to pip!

Secondly, great first post! hope to see more from you!

myspace username-beautiful_tragidy
I just want to find my way back to you...where love is strong and feels brand new.

punkrockerrobin

Senior Member

since 2001-05-15

Posts 1180
Sparks, NV

6 posted 2006-07-21 11:30 AM

wow. it always hard to say goodbye this i know. great first post! was really great. welcome to pip hope to see more from you.

hi my name is robin and i am addicted to poetry and men!
"and we'll all float on ok....." - modest mouse
aim - reklesabandnrckr
groove on sista!

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