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Teen Poetry #7
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Time to Say Goodbye
| Teen Poetry #7 |
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Time to Say Goodbye |
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Strider612 Junior Member
since 2003-12-21
Posts 46Alabama, United States of America |
I’m sorry to say this now But it’s simply been too long I never was supposed to fall But somehow that was wrong I’m sorry that I have to go And all you’ll have is just this note But I think you need to know And this is why I wrote My soul is sore and broken Held up only by my will I’ve had to keep on fighting And I know I’ve had my fill When I called, you never answered No one ever heard my cry I’m being such a coward, But it’s time to say goodbye It’s been so long since I’ve heard Even one kind, loving word Wanting me to do things better Guiding me with helping hands I’m pretty sure I’m too far gone To try to keep on hanging on It’s not fair to you or me But that’s just where life stands I’m too tired now to hold on But at least you’ll all know why It’s hard to go on living So it’s time to say goodbye If you want to blame yourself, I guess in part that’s fine But in the end it was my choice So the blame is really mine If you think you could’ve stopped me-- Well, you’ll never get to try I won’t go on much further; It’s time to say goodbye It’s been too long since someone cared Since someone asked me how I’ve fared Could things have worked out differently? I don’t think we’ll ever know Somewhere in life I lost my way And no one helped me find the day The night will finally take me now It’s time for me to go You all tried to bring me down When once I was so high I’m finally giving up now Now it’s time to say goodbye |
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| © Copyright 2004 Levi Pressnell - All Rights Reserved | |||
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~DreamChild~ Senior Member
since 2001-04-23
Posts 544in your dreams |
whoa man, however deep this poem may be.... it is way too long! lol  |
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Savage Quiescence Member
since 2002-07-29
Posts 326Wandering |
DC was right, it is long, but I think its length suits it. I especially liked the fourth stanza. You kept the repetition fresh, which isn't easy to do. Good write. |
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~DreamChild~ Senior Member
since 2001-04-23
Posts 544in your dreams |
yeah this is a great poem though! really heartfelt. i do like it. i'm just a lazy reader... |
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*Alli4000*
since 2004-03-21
Posts 3188The World of Poetry |
Yeah, it was long, but I like long poems. Just look at the first poem I wrote, it's probably the same length. I really liked this poem, alot. Great write Levi!  ~Alli~ *:.AIM = Alli4000.:* |
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tapper798 Member
since 2003-07-20
Posts 353My own world |
wow ur good. I loved this, especially how you repeated "it's time to say goodbye" but you somehow made it new each time. And the whole point of the poem..wow I could relate, very good job, I think I'm gonna keep this if you don't mind! One day you'll ask which is more important, you or my life. I'll answer my life and you'll walk away never knowing you are my life. |
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WinterWren Senior Member
since 2002-12-01
Posts 1044...Coming to |
Im afraid to reply to this, I don't want to sound insincere. This is one of the best, heartfelt pieces I've read on here. It almost made me cry, and that's hard to do. I hope if this is how you're feeling right now that things get better. Feel free to email me, Im always willing to listen. This is going in my library, thanks for sharing. But Im comforted |
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Savage Quiescence Member
since 2002-07-29
Posts 326Wandering |
I just reread this and thought I would say that, while I still think its magnificent, I don't like the repetition of "now" in the last two lines. Just thought I'd add that note as I add this one to my library |
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tearsoflove13762 Member
since 2004-09-05
Posts 488Texas.. and yes i have an accent |
oh my gosh i am usually a "lazy reader" but this one kept my eyes locked to the screen! THANKS SO MUCH FOR SHARING! i also am adding this to my library |
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tearsoflove13762 Member
since 2004-09-05
Posts 488Texas.. and yes i have an accent |
oh my gosh i am usually a "lazy reader" but this one kept my eyes locked to the screen! THANKS SO MUCH FOR SHARING! i also am adding this to my library |
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HopelessRomanticGuy Member
since 2001-08-17
Posts 495LI, New York |
Wow. One of the best suicide poems ever written. Even if the topic is anything but happy, I'm glad I got the opportunity to read this one. I felt this way recently, as well (see my post, "But Still It Remains"). It's not worth it, man. Not even the attempt, however tempting it may be. Anyway, before this begins to sound like an intervention, I'll stop here. Just know that this blows my poem away! -Rich "I'm burning in the heavens, |
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Strider612 Junior Member
since 2003-12-21
Posts 46Alabama, United States of America |
It's odd how one of my most brooding poems gets the most response. I wrote it when I was really down (which might seem kind of obvious), but I don't think I'd be able to kill myself even if I wanted to. I considered adding an ending to it that would've had something about regretting a decision like that, but at the time I didn't want to and I don't usually like to change things much after I'm finished. I wrote it a while back; by the time I posted it I was out of a lot of that darkness. Anyway, thanks for the feedback. About the repitition of "now" in the last stanza: I preferred leaving it in there. Don't really know what else to say other than that. |
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Spine Grinder Senior Member
since 2000-10-28
Posts 1127Standing In Silence... |
Wow...This was awesome. My favorite lines were- "My soul is sore and broken Held up only by my will I’ve had to keep on fighting And I know I’ve had my fill" Awesome. I'm putting this in my library. "Cuz I'm broken, when I'm lonesome, and I don't feel right when you're gone away..."~ Seether |
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