Teen Poetry #7 |
Blue Sky (my first poem as I return to this forum)... |
ShadyMakaveli Member
since 2002-08-21
Posts 128 |
Blue Sky A once Blue Sky Shines sun no more Clouds have gathered While innocence descends The power of thunder Gives beginning an end... Disappointment. The storm has begun Consequences follow Devastating earthquakes Demolish what was built Memories buried in rubble Overcome with guilt... Destruction. In a sea of emotions Waves come crashing down Questions with no answers Parents try hard to explain The words fall on deaf ears In pain children accept blame... Despair. With a few spoken words Emotions can't be expressed Life no longer makes sense Memories of a distant past The world has been shattered Never expected this to last... Divorce. Never forget the once Blue Sky... [This message has been edited by ShadyMakaveli (11-11-2004 04:09 AM).] |
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WinterWren Senior Member
since 2002-12-01
Posts 1044...Coming to |
Woah, that is such a powerful piece. Im speechless. Very different way to describe divorce, the imagery and emotion was excellent. I love the line, "The power of thunder Gives beginning an end" Nice to see more farmiliar faces around here. And I hope if this is from personal experience your pain eases soon. But Im comforted |
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aussie teen Member
since 2003-09-27
Posts 396Australia |
this is beautifully sad..... well done... i cant say i know what your going thru but this gives me a new meaning on what its like to have paprnets go thru something like this..... well done shady.... keep ones like this coming. Ruth live life as if your going to die tomorow....... but love as if your going to live forever...... |
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*Alli4000*
since 2004-03-21
Posts 3188The World of Poetry |
Disappointment, destruction, despair, and divorce...four things i would hate to go through. A great write, even though it's so sad. ~Alli~ *:.AIM = Alli4000.:* My Journal |
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earthdust Member
since 2003-10-28
Posts 53predestined and foreknown |
Awww Man... I was enjoying the poem at first, and when i neared the end ...DIVORCE... boom, like an emotional speed bump. but thats good, i really felt the feelings you were trying to express. which is why we share our poetry: to share our feelings. I found this poem to be a very worthy read, because to make someone feel the way you do is quite an accomplishment, and quite a task too! TY! |
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ShadyMakaveli Member
since 2002-08-21
Posts 128 |
Thank you all for your responses...Most appreciated...and I'm glad my poem was able to achieve the ability to create emotions within you as you read it. Thanks once again...and if anyone else has a response...I look forward to hearing it... |
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~DreamChild~ Senior Member
since 2001-04-23
Posts 544in your dreams |
hey man i really like this sh.... ~Express Yourself~ |
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