Teen Poetry #7 |
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Boys magazines/ Don't look at me |
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silhouetted Senior Member
since 2004-01-30
Posts 537New Zealand ![]() |
*first time post in teen poetry. i usually post in dark, but i kinda wanna try this one out. See how you like it... don't look at me your eyes eat away like acid on my skin caressing my innocence with such dirty intentions get off me your touch makes my skin prickle and shiver as your hands travel the length of my body close your mouth words spit out like fire spitting in the cold night as your tongue lingers too long don't hold me i can't stand the warmth of your body so close, so intimate so easy for you to coax me in get away you don't need me like the blood in your veins im not worth that much and you don't deserve blood anyway don't try to find me i'm too lost to be saved and your eyes eat away at me like i'm just another one of your magazines put your frustrations into four letter words - incubus [This message has been edited by silhouetted (10-11-2004 04:00 AM).] |
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WinterWren Senior Member
since 2002-12-01
Posts 1044...Coming to |
I liked this. Especially the line,"caressing my innocence with such dirty intentions" very descriptive, I liked the end too. Thanks for sharing. WinterWren- |
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electricxheart Member
since 2004-09-05
Posts 184far away from home. |
i really like this. i would have never thought it would end the way it did although i thought it was awesome. hope you keep on writing ![]() --kelly i could be an accident, but i'm still trying. |
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vampiana Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 296Nothing and Nowhere |
i liked it. it was good, it worked well. it wasn't my favourite, but i still really liked it. Just because you're paranoid, doesn't me they're NOT out to get you. |
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fearing-laughter Senior Member
since 2001-04-24
Posts 605land of cheese (Wisconsin) |
i really liked this, especially 'don't try to find me, i'm too lost to be saved' dramatic, but really true and relateable to probably a lot of people..at least for me. thanks for sharing, going in my library =) bergundy "Be who you want and do what you will, in the end those who matter won't mind, and those who mind won't matter." -Dr Suess- (a brilliant man) |
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*Alli4000*![]()
since 2004-03-21
Posts 3188The World of Poetry |
"don't look at me your eyes eat away like acid on my skin caressing my innocence with such dirty intentions" Liked this part alot. Glad that you posted in Teen because I like your writng alot. ![]() This is going into my library. ![]() ~Alli~ *:.AIM = Alli4000.:* |
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