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Teen Poetry #7
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The Voice of Raggedy Ann
| Teen Poetry #7 |
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The Voice of Raggedy Ann |
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Tequilia_Sunrise Senior Member
since 2003-02-19
Posts 612Lochalsh, Ontario, Canada 
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You sit across the room on your high shelf surrounded by your porcelain friends looking down your noses at us You go to dances and balls in your perfect dresses and perfect faces wearing the same, painted-on smile While I go to picnics and tea parties with mud pies in my everyday rags wearing an embroidered heart You receive admiration and awe I get stepped on and dropped to the ground But I cannot be broken you are not easily mended and you are covered with dust |
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| © Copyright 2004 Amanda Seymour - All Rights Reserved | |||
*Belabebeautiful*
since 2003-01-03
Posts 696washington, USA |
Mmmm...I enjoyed this piece a lot. I would have never thought to look at life from a favorite dolls perspective, but you are so very right. The one doll may be worn, but it was loved and played with while the others are still up there on the shelf. Very nicely written and it sends a lovely larger message out as well. well done ~Live and Laugh~ The memories are worth the pain when the happiness is outweighs the sorrow |
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*Alli4000*
since 2004-03-21
Posts 3188The World of Poetry |
I totally agree with *Belabebeautiful*...great poem. I really liked how you did it from the doll's point of veiw. Made me see things in a different way. GREAT POEM!!!  ~Alli~ |
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Tequilia_Sunrise Senior Member
since 2003-02-19
Posts 612Lochalsh, Ontario, Canada |
Thank-you |
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drummerboy678 Member
since 2003-10-28
Posts 134 |
Wow, this really is great. I love the point of view, but also the message throughout it. I guess the only thing I would have to complain about is the ending... It's not bad, but with such a strong piece, it seems like the ending needs something more. But really, if you keep it as it is, the poem is still great. Nicely done |
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Savage Quiescence Member
since 2002-07-29
Posts 326Wandering |
*Thumbs Up* Very imaginative! And you stuck with the image! You did a wonderful job with getting your point aross. This is a very unique piece, you did a great job. Keep writing. |
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fearing-laughter Senior Member
since 2001-04-24
Posts 605land of cheese (Wisconsin) |
weird, but cool. i liked it, the title was interesting, it catches the eye plus it's creative. hugs n fishes bergundy "Be who you want and do what you will, in the end those who matter won't mind, and those who mind won't matter." -Dr Suess- (a brilliant man) |
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a123 Member
since 2004-03-27
Posts 72 |
I really loved this poem... It kind of reminded me of Enid Blyton stories.... If I may suggest I think the last two lines maybe need to be written in a different way.They are a little unclear ,to me atleast..... Or maybe its just me anyway,i loved it hoping to read more love a123 |
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a123 Member
since 2004-03-27
Posts 72 |
Oh... I didnt notice drummerboy had already talked about the ending... oh never mind... a123 |
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Stepharoo Member
since 2004-05-04
Posts 149Washington, USA |
Very Cute! I really like the point of view you get when you read this...Great Job!!! Keep it up! |
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Tequilia_Sunrise Senior Member
since 2003-02-19
Posts 612Lochalsh, Ontario, Canada |
thankx everyone for your lovely comments  |
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blackandwhitehorizon Member
since 2003-05-05
Posts 183an akward state of mind |
i really like this poem... .and i know this is kind of contradicting everyone else's responses, but .. i really love the ending, that was my favorite part. the last lines really ... i'm not sure what they do but i like them a lot. anyways, nice job |
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sweetie_cute_2004 New Member
since 2004-04-11
Posts 5 |
wow good poem loved it |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Hey you did great with this one. One thing i was wondering is whether this person you're takling about is someone popular or whatever.... whether or not- Sometimes i wonder why a lot of "unpopular" kids get so mad at popular kids in highschool (not all popular kids are evil lol)... regardless, im sure thats not what you meant. I think you did very well with this one and i loved the way you wrote it. Plus the title was totally great. In addition I would kindly like to point out how much I love your name. Tequila is great!! (although I do not condone drinking for minors. Im an old man, i can do it! lol) ANyway- great poem! keep posting! I left my wallet in El Segundo... |
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