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WinterWren
Senior Member

since 2002-12-01

Posts 1044
...Coming to

0 posted 2004-05-10 02:57 PM

This one is different from my usual. Just let me know what you think

Robin, why do you lie there
so still
Robin, Why don't you move
why don't you blink your eyes?

Please don't stare so blankly
as I hide my face in shame
Please don't lay so silently
as I try not to fall apart.

Robin, why aren't you flying
soaring so freely
Robin, spread your wings
join the wind.

Please don't stay so unmoving
as I push back tears
please don't stay so stiff
as I think of your fear.

Robin, why am I crying
so quietly
Robin, why do I hide what I feel
so often?

Robin, why can't I bleed
like I want to
Robin, why can't I show my pain
more clearly?

Please let me push rewind
I'll go back as far as I need to
please let me save you
and you can save me, Robin.

This dissapointment is thick
this bitter failure cutting deep
Robin, why do you lie there?!
Please get up Robin
spread your wings Robin.
Fly.

W.W.
We were meant to live for so much more have we lost ourselves?
Maybe redemption has stories to tell maybe forgiveness is right where you fell.

Stepharoo
Member

since 2004-05-04

Posts 149
Washington, USA

1 posted 2004-05-10 03:16 PM

I think its very interesting. But good all the same.
Great Job!

Don_Juan
Member

since 2004-04-08

Posts 252
Far from where I am going

2 posted 2004-05-10 11:25 PM

wow. that is a powerful poem. keep up the good work

nice use of muffin

WinterWren
Senior Member

since 2002-12-01

Posts 1044
...Coming to

3 posted 2004-05-11 11:58 AM

Thanks for the replies. I really appreciate them!
Don_Juan: I like your signature!

W.W.
We were meant to live for so much more have we lost ourselves?
Maybe redemption has stories to tell maybe forgiveness is right where you fell.

HopelessRomanticGuy
Member

since 2001-08-17

Posts 495
LI, New York

4 posted 2004-10-30 03:21 AM

*Bows so deep his head's on the floor*  I still think it's amazing; the way you start out with one topic (The Dead Robin) and use it as an expression of yourself (Hiding your feelings and repressing pain makes you feel dead inside), and then combine the two in the end ("Please get up Robin
spread your wings Robin.
Fly" Begging the pain to stop; to be able to let it all go and move on).  You have some real talent there.  This was a very, very deep poem, and I'm kicking myself for missing the post.

And if I interrpereted that all wrong, then I'm kicking myself for being arrogant enough to think I could see into a persons soul and devine the meaning of their emotions.  Either way, a very, very, very, VERY good poem.  Goodnight (Goodmorning?).

                                      -Rich

Winamp is Playing:
"Blaze Of Glory"
Bon Jovi
Crossroads

Part of knowing where I'm going
is knowing where I've been
~Rich~

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