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Riley

Senior Member

since 2002-07-18

Posts 1038
in the pouring rain

0 posted 2004-05-03 08:24 PM

i can close my eyes and feel you whisper
tears on my fingertips
replacing the cuts
seared by your touches
everytime you held me
was like a heaven inside something else
that i cannot quite name
i promise you i'm terrified
of everything you stand for in my life
that i never want to let go of
i'll fall asleep next to you
so i will have another night
that i can call something mine
before i have to open my eyes again
and face what never was
looking up with blood running down
i pray for you and me
that everything will work
because i need someone to love me
without wanting to kill me first

no matter what i'll always love you
i swear

sweet_cute_palestinian04
Member

since 2004-04-11

Posts 418
Earth

1 posted 2004-05-03 09:06 PM

omg omg...awesome ,teriific..this poem is soo amazing...i turly loved it ,i dont know why others did not reply yet..but i am sure they will but i swear this poem was awesome .........keep writting please im begging you..lolol.....lovezzz

DancinQueen

Senior Member

since 2000-07-29

Posts 1092
Kokomo,IN,USA

2 posted 2004-05-04 04:26 AM

Wow, this was extremey deep and emotional. The last few lines kind of threw me, though. Great read. I'm still kind of speechless. The structure and flow were excellent if I might say. Great job, I think i've read work by you before, let's hear some more

**You can't always trust the people you want to**

blackandwhitehorizon
Member

since 2003-05-05

Posts 183
an akward state of mind

3 posted 2004-05-04 06:42 PM

this was great
emotional and sharp
fabulous

"love is but a song we sing and fear's the way we die"

Riley

Senior Member

since 2002-07-18

Posts 1038
in the pouring rain

4 posted 2004-05-04 06:48 PM

thank you all for replying...

sweet_cute- thanks a lot, i will be writing more, i promise

dancingqueen- the lsat few lines are meaning that i want someone who can love me without hurting me ever, thanks for replying

blackandwhite- thanks for the reply.
always
ri

no matter what i'll always love you
i swear

Stepharoo
Member

since 2004-05-04

Posts 149
Washington, USA

5 posted 2004-05-04 09:45 PM

I thought this poem was Fantastic!
Keep it up!

Censored
Member

since 2004-04-11

Posts 86

6 posted 2004-05-04 09:46 PM

~because i need someone to love me
without wanting to kill me first~

Strong Ending. Most def. enjoyed.
Keep Writing! -Censored-

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