Teen Poetry #7 |
![]() ![]() |
A Girl For A Gravestone |
![]() ![]() ![]() |
Ixxi Member
since 2004-01-02
Posts 77England |
Turn away, don't look back Into an imaginary person's eyes. Wipe your tears from your face, I might be the one you want in disguise. Refrain from reaching below The surface, for he is now gone and dead, His false heart carved in stone, His face now buried underneath black lead. Things happen for a reason. Now he suffers the pain he put you through. Life's a wait for wishes; You never found yours but still I wait for you. Your blistered hand is open; Your heart is sealed from grief and pain. Don't hurt yourself my precious Don't wait until the world turns again. Turn away, don't look back Into a dead person's eyes. Wipe your tears from your face, I am the one you always wanted in disguise. |
||
© Copyright 2004 Ixxi - All Rights Reserved | |||
majnu![]()
since 2002-10-13
Posts 1088SF Bay Area |
this somewhat morbidly romantic poem disturbed intriqued at the same time. -majnu |
||
Deep_Inside Member
since 2002-02-14
Posts 377i can't stop hiding |
This poem is awesome; I read is four times just to get it all. There are some things that I don't like. The last stanza repeats and I love the way it fits but I would have liked to the same emotion displayed in a different set of words. Some of the words you have chosen to describe some emotions don't seem to fit that well. Other than that I loved this poem... I hope that you get better in you poetry don't take what I said into to much consideration that’s just what I would have liked to see...keep writing...going into my library if you don't mind when you live you begin to die |
||
Ixxi Member
since 2004-01-02
Posts 77England |
Sure, you can put it in your library if you like. Thanks for the comments. x |
||
UnsilencedWords666 Member
since 2003-11-19
Posts 63Broken Memories & Falling Tears |
I really liked this; it had a morbid undertone which I found rather intriging...Keep up the great work! ::smiles for you:: *~*nessa bear*~* You can’t choose who you are Only what you will be Why can't you choose To let me be me...*~*Nessa Bear*~* |
||
kissa~rachelle Senior Member
since 2003-11-27
Posts 988nowhere special |
dido ^^^ Very awesome poem!!! I loved it. I want a relationship i can finally sink my teeth into.~ Alexander Sterling |
||
![]() ![]() |
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
![]() ![]() ![]() |
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |