Dark Poetry #4 |
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Taken |
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darkness_witch Senior Member
since 2003-12-03
Posts 516Underneath |
You stand over me A smug look on your demented face I cringe as you build up spit in your motuh I knew what came next As the siliva shot through the air My eyes rolled backwards into my head I lost conciousness I surfaced the world to find a sever in my lip And a bruise that felt like a 10 tonne weight on my forehead When I tried to move I felt like I was Strapped in a straitjacket I lift my head and Place my hands either side of me Slowely lifting myself up The world spun but I made it. I examined myself in the mirror I see your face if I look deep enough My shirt buttons undone A rip in my skirt My hair caked with my own blood A broken finger Coincedently the one wearing your ring I gently sit myself on your bed Shocked yet not surprised I walk into the bathroom and sit in the full bath The water is disturbingly cool I sit, watching my blood turn the water a putrid red Its then I realise what you took this one hurt to write NOT BASED ON PERSONAL EXPERIENCE |
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© Copyright 2004 Sophie A Ryan - All Rights Reserved | |||
Masked Intruder![]() ![]()
Moderator
Senior Member
since 1999-05-23
Posts 1231Near golden sunsets |
i can't decide what i think about this piece. i've read it several times and get several different interpretations. -*-*- |
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darkness_witch Senior Member
since 2003-12-03
Posts 516Underneath |
thanks for replying not sure if thats good or not.... i geuss its good cause it keeps people geussing...... hmm.... i wasnt to happy with it either... I thought it was good but a bit to full-on anyways thanx for posting again |
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Unseamedsoul Junior Member
since 2004-01-22
Posts 11Rowesville , S.C. |
I enjoyed it.. It is still keeping me guessing.. Which I love.. Keep it up !! |
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Vagabond Member
since 2004-01-23
Posts 163 |
I don't get it? I have an Idea of what it means. I like your creature antics better Vagabon the Lost One |
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NightFall Member
since 2004-01-28
Posts 88The land known as England |
my boyfriend says it the best poetry when your feelings are released otherwise its not as powerful. well written its excellent. |
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