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Cheechako
Junior Member

since 2007-04-28

Posts 21
Texas

0 posted 2007-04-30 11:10 AM

What say I now, in my search for Tao,
The darkest corners of the mind.
Where memories lurk, a tiny quirk,
Something I may not want to find.
Best yet forgotten, for it's slimy and rotten,
The crimes against myself.
Let it lay, for another day,
Way up on the very top shelf.
These things don't rest, and they surely will test,
The strongest immovable soul.
The interest does grow, as you come to know,
And time will come to pay the toll.
To truly be vexed, to see what comes next,
Is the reaper about to be paid.
That's when I fear, and I'm waiting to hear,
That justice will surely be weighed.
To some dark place, I am sent in disgrace,
A place to languish away.
Where rigor and toil, and the water does boil,
A world that's full of decay.

Cheechako

Twilight Warrior
Member

since 2007-02-22

Posts 106
The World That Never Was

1 posted 2007-04-30 11:14 AM

I felt it was a little inconsistent. Other than that it was a very well written poem. I liked the story behind the whole thing, though I couldn't accurately follow it. Good write.

"One last drink and the bottle breaks, returning us to the dust from whence we came"

Cheechako
Junior Member

since 2007-04-28

Posts 21
Texas

2 posted 2007-04-30 01:23 PM

I guess I am trying to say that even though we strive to do the right thing, we occasionally go astray, then worry and fret what the eventual conclusion will be. We look for answers in the most incredible places, and most times the answer is hidden behind false and confusing wrappings. I think nothing is concrete and everything is subject to ever changing reality. I hope that makes sense.
Cheechako

unholyjudgement
Member

since 2007-02-27

Posts 116
Wherever my soul takes me next

3 posted 2007-05-01 09:00 AM

At first ide have to agree with Twilight. But when u explained it made cents.

cherrys_rule
Member

since 2006-03-18

Posts 442

4 posted 2007-05-01 08:50 PM

I really like this poem that you wrote. It was very good. I hope to see more from you soon.

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