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Dark Poetry #4

Darkness

Trixy
New Member

since 2006-06-14

Posts 4

0 posted 2006-06-14 05:30 PM

The dark water continues to rise
As I swim towards the shore
The waves engulf me,
I'm ready to die once more
But I don't give up
I fight back to the top
Only to be pulled back down
The temptation to quit overtakes me
And the water flows red

Jess
Member

since 2006-06-06

Posts 243
Washington

1 posted 2006-06-14 05:48 PM

Silly rabbit, trix are for kids! Welcome to Passions Trixy. Interesting first post. I kept thinking it would go one way, and then it went another.

Sorrow
Member

since 2006-06-14

Posts 83
Ireland

2 posted 2006-06-14 08:50 PM

I love the feel of frustration in your poem.

trUstNooNe
Member

since 2006-05-21

Posts 91

3 posted 2006-06-14 10:58 PM

i like it i could imagine it in my head...very nice

Philmont
Member

since 2004-01-10

Posts 61

4 posted 2006-07-13 01:36 AM

can't resist helping a little guy. Good read.

stargal
Senior Member

since 2006-03-06

Posts 1352
OR USA

5 posted 2006-07-14 09:45 AM

Hey Trixy,

Welcome to piptalk, I hope you like the site!

Umm, yes, I have to agree with all the other posts. The ending and things were different, I kept thinking something else would happen but than it changed. Very interesting first post...I liked it though.

Thanks for sharing

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