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Dark Poetry #4

Unnoticeable

Skip
New Member

since 2006-04-13

Posts 8
Texas,Usa

0 posted 2006-04-13 05:14 AM

Unnoticeable by me.
-------------------

Standing on the side of the road,
watching cars pass me by slowly.
My heart sinks to the ground,
I feel so sad and lonely.
Why do I feel like this,
my heart constantly aches?
My eyes continue to fill with water,
and my body always shakes.
I know I exist somewhere in the world,
but noone ever noticies.
A girl under a shadow,
Covered by the darkness.
What is this darkness you ask,
its something I can't control.
Something that tairs me apart,
and gets into my soul.
I feel so unreal and unoticed,
maybe im just an illusion.
Nothings real,just a dream,
Continueing to leave me in confusion.
Am I obvious to everyone around me,
can they see the emptyness in me?
Does everyone know I have nothing,
and that im not the person I want to be?
Waiting for a ride on the side of the road,
waiting for something to push me away.
Ending me for good,
and saving me from seeing another horrible day.

~Skip~
*AKA*
~Haley~

SATURN
Member

since 2004-05-04

Posts 78
ok,us

1 posted 2006-04-13 12:42 PM

nice write and welcome to PiP you showed swallowing emotion hope to see more.

SATURN
aka
~Hali~

DarkShroud365
Junior Member

since 2006-04-10

Posts 18
Missouri, USA

2 posted 2006-04-13 05:05 PM

Very nice know the feeling and somedays I wish it would go away. But what wonderful words.

Skip
New Member

since 2006-04-13

Posts 8
Texas,Usa

3 posted 2006-04-14 02:03 PM

Thank you both for you comments. I appriciate it.

~Skip~
*AKA*
~Haley~

stargal
Senior Member

since 2006-03-06

Posts 1352
OR USA

4 posted 2006-04-14 03:29 PM

Hey,

Very nice, loved the emotions in this!

My favorite lines have to be,

"
Standing on the side of the road,
watching cars pass me by slowly.
My heart sinks to the ground,
I feel so sad and lonely"

@-->---

aliway
Member

since 2006-03-05

Posts 185
With in your eyes

5 posted 2006-04-23 07:25 PM

You can feel the emotion in it
Great work

*leah

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