To Forever Exist - pipTalk Forums

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

Dark Poetry #4

To Forever Exist

Kaos
Member

since 2001-08-02

Posts 317
between space and time

0 posted 2005-11-18 12:32 PM

Faded
  the same old view
       backs turned
   on me
Nauseous
       at the thought
  Weakened
       at the sight
of the same repetetive story
  Cursed
      to the cold
to forever     exist
      a desolate void
  Denied
       the one thing
providing     warmth to my soul
   rhythm to my heart
purpose    to my very existence
       Left
            to fade

"Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light"
-Dylan Thomas

fractal007
Senior Member

since 2000-06-01

Posts 1958

1 posted 2005-11-19 01:05 AM

A description of hell or one of monotony? To exist forever is not something I'd want to do in this world. But then, existence is what we make of it? Do we choose to live for ourselves, for God?

"my own opinions bore me most of the time anyway"

Maybe that's part of the problem you're looking at here

to forever exist

I don't like split infinitives, but that's just me and my strict highschool english teacher talking.

Denied
the one thing

What is this one thing the speaker is being denied? Apparently this is something that provides warmpth to her soul and rhythm to her heart. Perhaps it's poetry? Perhaps it music, or dancing, or maybe the speaker is actually dying and dreading the thought of somehow remaining conscious by some twisted work of fate wherein she might remain aware but confined and immobile within the coffin twelve feet under the ground.....

Just some humble thoughts.

Any idiot can see that the result is true.
-- argumentum ad idiotum
Me!

Kaos
Member

since 2001-08-02

Posts 317
between space and time

2 posted 2005-11-22 03:06 PM

you have an insight into things, very interesting ideas, thanks for the comments

- mike

"Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light"
-Dylan Thomas

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.