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Dark Poetry #4
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Guided by Force
| Dark Poetry #4 |
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Guided by Force |
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green_itchy_stuff Senior Member
since 2003-06-26
Posts 1929New Caney, Tx |
The pyramid Limestone blocks Several tons each Sitting in place for centuries Not moving And you in the center Trying to find your way out In total darkness No light How do you get out? You feel for cracks in the walls But there are none A force from no where in particular Creates a roaring sound And blocks move Even though you can't see They tuck themselves through one another And move in various directions A stop And you feel around again You can see a tiny light several yards off But its not enough light to see You're too far away You feel some more And the wall falls out from under your hand To a passage At the end of this passage you see A slight glow Like that of a small fire Reflecting on the wall With somewhat of a gentle murderous huffing sound In a room Near the end of this passage But nothing has been seen down here Or alive for centuries Is this firey glow trust worthy? You look back to the light And its like daylight But its so far away How do you get closer? When the idea crosses your mind You hear the blocks begin to move again You can see the day light stronger Brighter That freedom there The murderous roar sounds almost playful But you can tell it isn't It would be easy to go that way You look back to your light And hear the sounds as before Your light has gotten brighter You can even see slightly now Understanding your parameters The first passage is still open And available for you The wicked laughing of those Who have never seen it It makes you feel uneasy And you notice your slightly lighted room Becomes a little dark What has happened? The light is gone You can't see again Except what you have your doubts about You remember how the light Shown brighter the first time You felt a desire for it And you ask it to come back Then look to where You last remember seeing it And there's nothing At first The wall opens up One block at a time And the light is back The wall opens in different directions Each time it does so you take steps to the openings You have almost become like the blocks Yourself And you shift accordingly to your limits The light opens up Finally you're free How did you get there in the first place...? I couldn't tell you But more importantly What made the walls move To let you out let God ROAR,... in power... |
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| © Copyright 2004 Kenneth Craig Rogers - All Rights Reserved | |||
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green_itchy_stuff Senior Member
since 2003-06-26
Posts 1929New Caney, Tx |
If this is too long I'm sorry, but inspiration wouldn't leave and it didn't feel finished when it could have been finished so simply and much earlier. Peace, love, you guys rock. -GIS let God ROAR,... in power... |
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EveGnosis Member
since 2002-02-21
Posts 300New York, USA |
it's ironic that you have to go into the depths of the pyramid and lose yourself only to pray and finally find that which the pyramid has been pointing to for centuries... this was great imagery, and i do not feel that your point would have been as magnificent if you shortened it. great poem. of all the things we try to find... it's only love we keep. |
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green_itchy_stuff Senior Member
since 2003-06-26
Posts 1929New Caney, Tx |
Thanks Eve, I didn't think about the pyramid pointing to the sky when I was writting. But that is the most obvious and unnoticed thing I've ever thought about. -GIS let God ROAR,... in power... |
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News_From_Nowhere Member
since 2002-06-14
Posts 173CU, NY |
A grand read with A grand message. Enjoyed, Green! & the length worked well. "So give life to your dreams, for there lies your survival, and cast your heart beyond those faded scenes, and I'll bring you through the storm" |
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green_itchy_stuff Senior Member
since 2003-06-26
Posts 1929New Caney, Tx |
Thank you News. I wasn't sure if it was too long or not. -GIS let God ROAR,... in power... |
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Purity Senior Member
since 2001-11-20
Posts 526Once Upon, USA |
"Guided by the vision of the Truth that will abound..." Wow, Craig, this was a nicely done dramatic piece that indeed does have a grand message. Good one! Wings bruised from turning away in such confined space...Not broken...still healable...still feathered with life, somewhere |
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green_itchy_stuff Senior Member
since 2003-06-26
Posts 1929New Caney, Tx |
Thank you Purity. Its like waiting on time. -GIS let God ROAR,... in power... |
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silhouetted Senior Member
since 2004-01-30
Posts 537New Zealand |
long but worth it. great stuff dude -Laura you're the only one keeping me alive |
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Hollow_Emptiness Senior Member
since 2004-02-01
Posts 715New Zealand |
Uh-huh! That's all I can think of saying, but yeah...what did make the walls move? I liked it so much Craig. And am so glad the character came out safely. I can just see deserts now. Hehe. Nice write. Hollow. Courtney. You just got to see me through another day |
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darkness_witch Senior Member
since 2003-12-03
Posts 516Underneath |
this rocks, nice work Craig. loved the length, personally! hehe awesome love and empathy sophie nirvana means freedom from pain, suffering and the external world. |
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green_itchy_stuff Senior Member
since 2003-06-26
Posts 1929New Caney, Tx |
thanks you guys. I was a little nervous about it being so long. Courtney- aren't the pyramids near some kind of stream, like the Nile River, or are they in the middle of nowhere. Either way if it was me I'd climb to the top and sit on it just to spite it. If you didn't catch the drift maybe you should, ironically, look deeper. My guitar's name is Jennifer. |
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