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green_itchy_stuff
Senior Member

since 2003-06-26

Posts 1929
New Caney, Tx

0 posted 2004-11-20 03:38 AM

let him type for me
-----------------------

I am not here because i want to be
i am here to destroy everything inside this man's head,
soul, spirit,...
I hate him
I would love to cause him all hell before he dies
Even if he does go to heaven it wasn't
without my harrassment
At best I'll take him as my own

I'll haunt him as long as I can
Basically forever
or until god says no
His pretty pictures go away
He becomes clean
Pittifully clean
I hate the stupid idiot

I'll kill part of him
If I don't get all
and slice and beat those brains in
let him die to me

I know my master will be pleased with me then
The destruction of this one
with such potential
to ruin certain parts of out kingdom

Now I'm inside
I have this one at least for the moment
he'll go to church
pathetic
and his little god will make me leave
but I'll get him again
I'll make his life a worse hell than it already is
and this promise will come through
----------------------

Shake him out
I hate that stupid being
God I pray I can be free of that jerk
Please Lord
Please deliver me one more time
I know I don't deserve it, but please
I'm sorry Lord
Praise you forever for you are the Lord, the God
of Israel, Ancient of Days

I'm sorry for failling you again Lord
I pray I can do better
I love you God
Thank you
Amen

Doing the same thing a million times in a row will definitely affect your head. Read and pratice and read and pratice and read and prati........ead a

EveGnosis
Member

since 2002-02-21

Posts 300
New York, USA

1 posted 2004-11-20 11:46 AM

i think that self-witnessing, and coming to realize your own personal afflictions and need for rescue, is one of the most amazing ways that he proves the "i'll find you" thing.
what an amazing privilege to be given a chance to see such power from bleak beginning to humble release by prayer and faith.
...wondering if the world wouldn't be a better place if only...

of all the things we try to find... it's only love we keep.

green_itchy_stuff
Senior Member

since 2003-06-26

Posts 1929
New Caney, Tx

2 posted 2004-11-20 06:53 PM

Thank you.

-GIS

Pssst whats up with the smileys? lol.

Doing the same thing a million times in a row will definitely affect your head. Read and pratice and read and pratice and read and prati........ead a

PainBaneChaos
Member

since 2003-10-17

Posts 150
The point of no return

3 posted 2004-11-20 09:18 PM

I can't remember what the movie was, but it was a felon with like eight different personalities that he let take control of him, and they all came together in a place inside his head and were stuck there until the killer,(which was the reason he was a con to begin with, the evil one murdered someone) was caught and eliminated. Well, this is kind of what I thought of, choosing to leave out the obvious religious sin and repent theme. It was good anyway, I'm just offering it from a non-christian and rambling point of view.

"World's use is cold, world's love is vain, world's cruelty is bitter bane; but is not the fruit of pain." Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Hollow_Emptiness
Senior Member

since 2004-02-01

Posts 715
New Zealand

4 posted 2004-11-21 01:24 AM

Is that movie "Identity"? With John Cusack? I love that movie.

"As I was going up the stairs,
I met a man who was not there
He was not there again today,
I wish, I wish, he would go away."

Well written, kind of frightening, but in a good way. Loved it.

Hollow.
Courtney.

I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad. The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had. - Gary Jules, Mad World.

EveGnosis
Member

since 2002-02-21

Posts 300
New York, USA

5 posted 2004-11-21 03:10 AM

the smilies were an attempt to show support. the yellow one being the questioning, confused, leaving it up to faith one... and the other one being the one who says i support you and believe in you and all is well. if the red bothers you, think of red as a color of love, not a devilish hue. sorry, didn't mean to confuse you. it was meant to say "all is well" and i have nothing but supportive love for those as stupid as i...

of all the things we try to find... it's only love we keep.

Purity
Senior Member

since 2001-11-20

Posts 526
Once Upon, USA

6 posted 2004-11-21 03:18 AM

...Speachless...
Craig, I'm not worthy to give a response to this one, other than to say you are a beautiful person.

Wings bruised from turning away in such confined space...Not broken...still healable...still feathered with life, somewhere

green_itchy_stuff
Senior Member

since 2003-06-26

Posts 1929
New Caney, Tx

7 posted 2004-11-21 10:03 PM

thank you everybody and that movie was pretty cool. I saw it too. It wasn't so much as a sin and repent for others as it was for me. If that is what you got out of it, well thats cool.
And about the smiley thing I'm sorry for not catching on, I've seen it before quite a few times and this is actually the first time I've asked. I'm sorry if asking came across the wrong way.
thank you purity.

-GIS

Doing the same thing a million times in a row will definitely affect your head. Read and pratice and read and pratice and read and prati........ead a

silhouetted
Senior Member

since 2004-01-30

Posts 537
New Zealand

8 posted 2004-12-16 08:54 PM

good stuff

LOR

you're the only one keeping me alive

darkness_witch
Senior Member

since 2003-12-03

Posts 516
Underneath

9 posted 2004-12-17 02:09 AM

oh wow... how the hell did i miss this one?

ahhh i loved it... loved how raw and upfront it was.

alot of anger and hate in this one hehe
this one rocked hardcore

love and empathy
sophie

nirvana means freedom from pain, suffering and the external world.

A Tone of Voice
Member

since 2001-07-18

Posts 287

10 posted 2004-12-17 02:35 PM

I hope I don't offend you with this reply---because certainly I could "feel" the emotion. That speaks volumes to me.

I however have trouble with hating oneself, hate seldom generates change positively. I believe it's through acceptance (unconditional love) and the realization no one is perfect or pure in their intent---if we were, we'd be unable to recognize our failings or strive to improve--to love ourselves through the process, which teaches us to forgive and love unconditionally. As I believe God does. This world is tough, and I personally don't view God counting our failings, or condeming as much as praising our efforts to love and within that parameter includes ourselves.

As I said I hope I don't offend, and perhaps this isn't the place to disclose such, it's just...I spent the majority of my life putting me down, and now that I've learned to accept and love me to a greater degree, it's been easier for me to improve. But of course we each have to figure out what works for us....Intense poem, as indicated I felt the emotion! Wow!

green_itchy_stuff
Senior Member

since 2003-06-26

Posts 1929
New Caney, Tx

11 posted 2004-12-18 12:31 PM

thanks silhouetted, by what is your name refering to?  I was just wondering?

And I guess you picked up on a few things darkness,  Yeah.

A Tone of Voice, wow I love your name.  Yeah I get the head battle thing every now and then, actually its pretty often.  God will take the cruelty away eventually.  Thats actually the reason I called the poem Stupid is because of what I did in the very first line.  "let him type for me"  I gave control over so easy instead of fighting and standing upright, only to beg for mercy later.  I still get that, but it'll stop and I won't even notice, because God is awesome like that.  lol.

-GIS

My guitar's name is Jennifer.

silhouetted
Senior Member

since 2004-01-30

Posts 537
New Zealand

12 posted 2004-12-18 12:33 PM

my name? what do ya mean?

you're the only one keeping me alive

green_itchy_stuff
Senior Member

since 2003-06-26

Posts 1929
New Caney, Tx

13 posted 2004-12-18 11:53 PM

Yeah, what does silhouetted mean. I keep misspelling it, and since I have to keep refering back to get the spelling right I thought I could just expand my vocabulary the rest of the way and find out what it means. lol.

-GIS

My guitar's name is Jennifer.

silhouetted
Senior Member

since 2004-01-30

Posts 537
New Zealand

14 posted 2004-12-18 11:55 PM

oh ha! alrite well, silhouette is the black outline of something, kinda like a shadow i like to think. i just fancied the word

! ha u can just call me laura tho.

-Laura

you're the only one keeping me alive

green_itchy_stuff
Senior Member

since 2003-06-26

Posts 1929
New Caney, Tx

15 posted 2004-12-19 10:39 PM

I'll just call you laura, silhouetted. lol.
-GIS

My guitar's name is Jennifer.

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