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MyCrimsonTears
New Member

since 2004-09-04

Posts 8

0 posted 2004-09-05 02:11 PM

after that action i found myself leaving you for reasons i dont know
i hope you are happy seeing me like this on the vary ground you confessed to me on
life hurst i know but it gets better, untill this final action you have fourced
upon me
the sweet release from you and the others makes me more pleased than you can ever know
leaving with no regrets from this place and smiling at you the way i am, seeing the look on your face, seeing the hatred you have for me
i have fought for you and have left me like this where my eyes get darker and darker as the tears poor.
my feeling has collapsed and the pain is leaving me
you have such anger and fury for me even though you have commited this act on me i still feel for you
i am leaving you now please dont do what you did to me to others run and live your life with some one else, i am sorry i could not do more, all that you have done means nothing now only things that you will do from now
time will stop for me, eternity is what i await and i will wait for you
but that is still aways off
so long

green_itchy_stuff
Senior Member

since 2003-06-26

Posts 1929
New Caney, Tx

1 posted 2004-09-05 02:54 PM

This poem sounds like maybe you two should use patience towards each other. And then understanding is left to the eye of the beholder. The general feel of it all is like a blender and its kind of beautiful. Repeated refrences to pain and love. Extreme feelings and emotions tossed back and forth, like and angry see with some places of surface on the water smooth and some torn by wind and rain. Nice write.
-GIS

Everything is beautiful in it's own time

littlewing
Member Rara Avis

since 2003-03-02

Posts 9655
New York

2 posted 2004-09-07 02:54 PM

Crimson:

this is a beautiful prose piece,
you bleed here . . .

MyCrimsonTears
New Member

since 2004-09-04

Posts 8

3 posted 2004-09-07 10:13 PM

thanks for the comments, it makes me happy that you enjoyed it. i have this one published, and its one my personal favs... thank again and look for me.

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