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Open Poetry #30
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Sadelite
Member Elite
since 2003-10-11
Posts 2519


0 posted 2003-12-07 08:09 PM


Appeal of glimmers through warmed steel
seen by child's playground eyes,
Drawing near wavy mirror
reflecting self as visualized.


                 Uphill
              from ground
            upon tiptoed steps
          holding tight rails for life.
         Looking down from high above
      small things seem clear, no strife.
     Sitting at the top, hands anchored rail
    for thrusting push-off down sliding trail.


Ready, set, and now to go
lifting hands from safety's rails.
From the push, the gravity pulls;
Inevitably, gravity rules.

Appeal of glimmers through steel blew  
his eyes sliding down her soul.
Accepting good things as visualized,
he mirrors herself as whole.

Appeal.  
Uphill, again to go.

[This message has been edited by Sadelite (12-08-2003 07:57 AM).]

© Copyright 2003 Sadelite - All Rights Reserved
Ratleader
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass
1 posted 2003-12-08 01:20 AM


I like what you did with this, shape and substance both....and the message, one that's good for a lot of people, yes...

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
2 posted 2003-12-08 02:11 AM


nice...I enjoyed this one
Sadelite
Member Elite
since 2003-10-11
Posts 2519

3 posted 2003-12-08 04:27 PM


RAtleader,
   Thanks for the positive comments; I just about deleted this one, but was too eager to get something started and finished!   I've been concentrating  on a poem entitled Mudman, but it may take some time before that one is finished.   I think, at least Part 1, will be better to your liking--it has a much better flow and better imagery.
    Incidently, you must have bopped on here at the exact time I was editing this early a.m.!   Insomnia?  Anyway, it was a delight to find a response immediately after editing.

Passing Shadows,
   It is always so nice to read your poetry and have you visit.   I hope all is going well for you.  Are you posting anything special on the holiday site?   If so, let me know.   I have been pretty busy this week and not read posts and responded as I would like.   I'll try to check those I missed soon.
                        Sadelite

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
4 posted 2003-12-08 06:54 PM


Nice writing...James
Sadelite
Member Elite
since 2003-10-11
Posts 2519

5 posted 2003-12-08 06:57 PM


James,
   Thanks.  I'm glad you like it.  Happy writing to you!
                            Sadelite

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