Obsession with almost - pipTalk Forums

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

Brad Majors

Member Elite

since 2001-04-03

Posts 2647
Georgia

0 posted 2003-12-03 12:41 PM

Wishing dreams never uttered
For dedicated love songs never sung
Some Daddy's girl would have
Been have swept off her feet
But frozen like department store mannequin
Just stands there
Phone plastered to his ear
"Hello"
But no ones home
And soon turns to dial tone
As he slumps over
Lost in his sad world of almost
Now older
alone
Left to fantasize
What could have been?
Pictures of her
line his walls
candles scented
With her lavender perfume
Like some cultic shrine
Music plays what could've been
Their song
He lies on his king-size bed
imagining
the life he almost had
In the Back room of
His parents house.

marcel
Senior Member

since 2003-03-02

Posts 660
az, usa

1 posted 2003-12-03 12:48 PM

the words in this piece almost come to life, it is described so perfectly that it had me in that same room. very real situation and expressed deeply. thanks for sharing

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

2 posted 2003-12-03 12:54 PM

I understand the bitterness

Brad Majors

Member Elite

since 2001-04-03

Posts 2647
Georgia

3 posted 2003-12-03 12:56 PM

thank you

bbent
Senior Member

since 2001-01-07

Posts 521
Alaska

4 posted 2003-12-04 02:14 AM

Always loved the way you tend to end your poems,that little suprize that puts the iceing on the cake...Damn,I'm gonna be spending a week or two with my folks soon,hope I've forgotten this by then.lol

Live like it's your last day...
Dance like nobody's watching...
Love like you've never been hurt...

Ericc
Member Elite

since 2003-01-31

Posts 4178

5 posted 2003-12-04 09:40 AM

Wow...!!

Eric

LeeJ
Member Patricius

since 2003-06-19

Posts 13296

6 posted 2003-12-04 11:34 AM

a new day dawns within each of your poems...very well done, Brad...thank you for sharing, smiles and hugs

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius

since 2000-10-09

Posts 13989

7 posted 2003-12-04 11:56 AM

Ouch! Brad I can feel this one. Hugs.

Brad Majors

Member Elite

since 2001-04-03

Posts 2647
Georgia

8 posted 2003-12-04 01:26 PM

thank you

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

9 posted 2004-01-22 12:57 PM

just wanted you to know,
I've read this twice, Brad,
and heard the heartbeat

muted

Member Elite

since 2004-01-15

Posts 2949
Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving

10 posted 2004-01-22 01:00 PM

**ive got that same obsession**
and i'll just echo
*WOW*

WildPoet
Member

since 2003-11-10

Posts 205
California

11 posted 2004-03-10 03:52 AM

This one broke through to me.

Very good!

WildPoet

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.