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Open Poetry #30
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Full Right Rudder
| Open Poetry #30 |
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Full Right Rudder |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida 
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“You saved me”, he said as he peered at himself in the mirror looking at what is mentally comparing to what was I was speechless for I thought it was him that had saved me I wanted a piece of that mirror Maybe we saved each other maybe that is what it felt like to find your other half To be saved "sit on top of the world and tell me how you feel...'cause what you feel is what I feel for you.." |
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| © Copyright 2004 Susan Caldwell - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
OUTSTANDING Susan...I ADORE this one, so much truth in these words. Ya know, you really are GOOD! |
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Greeneyes  
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
Susan beautiful and the love just glows..... |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
ya know, I needed to read this again, it is as beautiful as is your heart is! (and now into the library it goes) |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
Donna~ You are way too kind..  and thank you for it.Lauren~ Thank you....  "sit on top of the world and tell me how you feel...'cause what you feel is what I feel for you.." |
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Brad Majors
since 2001-04-03
Posts 2647Georgia |
Beautiful Susan! |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Maybe we saved each other maybe that is what it felt like to find your other half To be saved Yep, my friend, I think you both have found it!!  Hugs to you both,  Ethel |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
Thank you both, Dan and Ethel!  "sit on top of the world and tell me how you feel...'cause what you feel is what I feel for you.." |
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muted
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving |
i was going to paste a bit here..but decided the whole poem "lives" as a whole, i wont dismantle it! but i do like it, so much, more than i can explain! ...to be saved....Someday I'll fly, Someday I'll soar, |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
My only constructive critique would be to make this two independent thoughts, and add a period to your second stanza at the end. Other than that? Good reading! |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
Thank you Dawn! Thank you Karilea...and could you show me what you mean? (not the period...lol) "sit on top of the world and tell me how you feel...'cause what you feel is what I feel for you.." |
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Ravenwolfvoyager Member
since 2003-12-25
Posts 326 |
Wow Susan that was a tremendous write, so well layered. A very enjoyable read. Thank you. |
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Kaoru
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892where the wild flowers grow |
Indeed! |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Yes, Susan, I think you're right! Good one! |
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choshi Senior Member
since 2004-01-01
Posts 1184New York |
Oh Yes! beautiful...Just right. ~C Maybe we saved each other This last verse really does speak to my heart...Thank you ~C |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
Thank you all for your kind and generous replies to my thought babbles. "sit on top of the world and tell me how you feel...'cause what you feel is what I feel for you.." |
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