LITTLE BIRD [children's poem]

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richard taylor
Member

since 2004-01-13

Posts 136

0 posted 2004-01-17 01:33 PM

I saw a sparrow fall from the sky
I picked it up I don't know why,
Its little body so small and thin,
Its wings half flapping so hard to win.
I cradled it and took it home
With milky bread we fought for life,
We fought all day, together as one.
Twelve hours later the fight was won.
It was the best of times for me
Strange how fate sets our problems free,
Oh little bird how I loved thee.

VAS
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-11-16

Posts 7450
Oregon

1 posted 2004-01-17 01:41 PM

I like how you begin and end with rhyme, yet during the struggle, the fight for life, rhyme is absent. Just as it it often difficult to find "reason" when enduring a struggle, rhyme is surely absent as well. That's what the form you've chosen seems to tell.

Whether on the shoal or on the shore,
I'll seek the lighthouse evermore.

richard taylor
Member

since 2004-01-13

Posts 136

2 posted 2004-01-17 01:45 PM

Hi Vas,
Yes that's how I wrote the poem, I am pleased you liked it and thanks for the responce.
regards Richard.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

3 posted 2004-01-17 01:52 PM

Very much enjoyed this...
you write with such a gentle pen.
Hugs~

In the midst of winter..
I found there lives within me,
an invincible summer.

garysgirl

Member Laureate

since 2002-09-29

Posts 19237
Florida, USA

4 posted 2004-01-17 01:53 PM

Richard, have you published your
chidrens book of rhymes yet? If not,
you should. You are very talented.

Ethel

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

5 posted 2004-01-17 01:55 PM

Richard~
This is so touching ... a beauty to be sure~
I mentor a group of young ones and would like to share it with them, as we are doing some 'how nature touches me' poems in our group~

Thank you for sharing a precious lesson~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost,
the spirit rejoices over what it has left.
- Sufi epigram <))><

[email][email protected]

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

6 posted 2004-01-17 02:11 PM

what a big heart you have!

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean

since 1999-07-07

Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla

7 posted 2004-01-17 02:15 PM

richard,
Very nice, enjoyed the read.

richard taylor
Member

since 2004-01-13

Posts 136

8 posted 2004-01-17 02:16 PM

Hi Ethel,
I have had a few published, in magazines this one in The Christen poetry reviw in stafforshire England. But because of a health problem [siatica disc ex] I have only just started writing again, I have not had any books published. thanks so much it meens a lot.
take care Richard.

richard taylor
Member

since 2004-01-13

Posts 136

9 posted 2004-01-17 02:18 PM

Hi Marge,
I could ask for nothing more as a writer than your kind remarks, I hope the kids like it.
take care Richard.

garysgirl

Member Laureate

since 2002-09-29

Posts 19237
Florida, USA

10 posted 2004-01-17 02:23 PM

You are very welcome, Richard. I'm glad
that you started writing again and joined
us here. I love your poetry.

I hope that your health is better very soon.

Ethel

richard taylor
Member

since 2004-01-13

Posts 136

11 posted 2004-01-17 02:24 PM

Hi Passing shadows,
Thankyou for your comments.I am gratful
take care Richard.

richard taylor
Member

since 2004-01-13

Posts 136

12 posted 2004-01-17 02:26 PM

Hi Seymour,
Thakyou for taking the time to reply I am very gratfull.
regards Richard.

iliana
Member Patricius

since 2003-12-05

Posts 13434
USA

13 posted 2004-01-17 02:51 PM

A classic! Richard this was wonderful, saying so much.

richard taylor
Member

since 2004-01-13

Posts 136

14 posted 2004-01-17 03:54 PM

Hi Iliana,
your words moved me.
take care Richard.

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

15 posted 2004-01-17 04:09 PM

(wipes tears) Awwwwwwww, you have the true golden heart of a poet who can sing to the children, sweet friend, this made me cry as I know this belief too well and have seen miacles like this before my own eyes too, God Bless You, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Richard, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"You'll find something that's enough to keep you
But if the bright lights don't receive you
You should turn yourself around and come back home" MB20

Sadelite
Member Elite

since 2003-10-11

Posts 2519

16 posted 2004-01-17 04:25 PM

Richard,

I,too, enjoyed this. We've been fortunate to rescue a couple of American kestrals and nurse them to good health, but not so fortunate with small bunnies. Our last rescue was that of baby possums. (They're really cute and several can hang on your fingers.) I enjoyed this and think it's for us grown-ups as well! Thank you for posting. Wishing you luck with further endeavors, ~Sadelite~

richard taylor
Member

since 2004-01-13

Posts 136

17 posted 2004-01-18 09:01 AM

Hi Noah,
Thankyou so much I am overwhelmed by your kind words and thoughts
God bless.
TAKE CARE Richard.

richard taylor
Member

since 2004-01-13

Posts 136

18 posted 2004-01-18 09:04 AM

Hi Sadelite,
Thankyou for reading the poem, it is a true story it happened to me when young and I did love the bird.
take care and good luck with your work.
Richard.

richard taylor
Member

since 2004-01-13

Posts 136

19 posted 2004-01-18 09:08 AM

Hi Noah,
Thankyou for your kind words which moved me so much
God bless you.
take care Richard.

richard taylor
Member

since 2004-01-13

Posts 136

20 posted 2004-01-18 09:11 AM

Hi Sadelite,
Thankyou I am pleased you liked the poem it is a true story and happened to me when young I wish you all the best with your work
take care Richard.

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