Open Poetry #30 |
Lullaby from a Nylon-Stringed Guitar |
LiquidMidnight Member
since 2003-09-24
Posts 50 |
Lullaby from a Nylon-Stringed Guitar Meet me tonight, at the withered ends of bliss So I may muse from the lyrical arias that weep from your kiss But then I would stir all the melodies lying dormant in your head Touching the memory of someone who’s so beautifully vulnerable, reminding them that their soul was once dead Entwine all of the abstract voicings That they may play mordant across your nape In the shape On the crepe Stealing away the shards of Segovia’s tears, that strings have never shed And after the dream-time pop has burnt itself from the skies I will lament on the mascara that tainted all of those nocturnes in your eyes BTW, I'm aware that I used "beautifully" as an adjective and not properly as an adverb. |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
LiquidMidnight~ This is absolutely BEAUTIFUL~ BEAUTIFULLY done~ *Huglets* ~*Marge*~ ~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost, |
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ThisDiamond Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353Michigan, USA |
Given the content and kismet of the write...I wasn't distracted by the beautifully as much as the beauty. Great write. TD |
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LiquidMidnight Member
since 2003-09-24
Posts 50 |
Thank you. |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
Wow, what a cool write, liquid music. |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Great use of the English language in a musical composition! |
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Kaoru
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892where the wild flowers grow |
I'm speechless... that is a first. |
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LiquidMidnight Member
since 2003-09-24
Posts 50 |
From Iliana: Great use of the English language in a musical composition! (to bad the board doesn't have a "quote" command ) Thank you, but it's not really a musical composition. I really just used music as a vehicle for the poem. Guitar players have always been romanticized so I thought about using guitar as the motif. I chose to portray a classical/flamenco guitarist because of the attention to technique. (sexual association with the hands of course) Anyone can crank a Marshall and play loud, but it takes subtle detail of the hands to play a nylon stringed guitar well. And I'm starting to go off on a tangent so I'll be quit now. *LOL* |
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steavenr Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058 |
Personally, I think you used the word beautifully correctly. How vulnerable--beautifully vulnerable...sounds like correct usage to moi. What I really liked was the phrase "withered ends of bliss". Nice...very nice. I'll do you one better on usage...that phrase is fragilly exquisite. Find that one in the dictionary. |
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Kristin Eve Member
since 2004-01-13
Posts 89On, Canada |
"And after the dream-time pop has burnt itself from the skies I will lament on the mascara that tainted all of those nocturnes in your eyes" your poem is beautiful. Thank you for sharing. By the way... i really like the rythm of this poem "Who you are speaks so loudly...I can hardly hear what you are saying" |
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Kaoru
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892where the wild flowers grow |
My significant other plays the classical guitar (among other various instruments), and I've noticed the complexities of it. I think the metaphor is exquisite, all things considered. I know I commented on this once before but, this poem is brilliantly written. It did remind me of the first time I met him and he played my guitar. I, of course being so shut in, was in awe. The guitar IS a very seductive instrument. Anyway, I'll shush now, just had to put in my two cents. |
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LiquidMidnight Member
since 2003-09-24
Posts 50 |
I definatly agree that the guitar is a seductive instrument. (But by saying that are you implying that the bagpipes are not seductive? ) I'm a professional musician (a bassist actually) so I try to be pretty intune with the dexterity/sexual association with playing a stringed instrument. (horns also have an obvious seductive quality, but I think they respresent intercourse more where I guitar can be associated with foreplay) Well, I'm going to quit responding to this thread because I feel like I'm unfairly bumping it to the top when I do. |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
use words whatever way you want...this is awesome! |
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