Open Poetry #30 |
A Conversation with the Night Light |
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
A Conversation with the Night light A cry touched my waking sleep. Was it real? You had already cancelled the stars. With your tenacity you made shadows in my dark. Then you nosed in to every opening with your light so sharp it had points. I heard a cry tossed into my turn. Was it you or was it me? [This message has been edited by Martie (01-08-2004 12:05 PM).] |
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© Copyright 2004 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved | |||
iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Martie -- this I recognize -- the longing so much to be with someone -- then again, maybe it was real! Appreciate the write. hugs...........jo |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
MartieSis~ Oh .. oh ... oh, I like what you do with your moon-thoughts~ Such a stirring write~ *Huglets* ~*Marge*~ ~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost, |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
You had already cancelled the stars. With your tenacity you made shadows in my dark these lines..strike me... an interesting piece Martie... and one that leave the reader open to take from it what they would and on the level they would. I'm not a fan of much moon poetry... for I think the image and the forms are often overused.. but this... I truly enjoyed! |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Martie You painted a blue moon. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Now you know I'm knowing the feel of this... LOL...thought you said your muse was gone. Feed it dark chocolate, did you? |
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Goodknight Member Elite
since 2002-06-15
Posts 2386Ohio, USA |
what a powerful image you paint with this poem - longing wondering experiencing - maybe it is a blue moon - loved it and glad to see your poetry again - I miss my periodic Martie fix when it is resting - hugs - Paul |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Wow! Wonderful write sweet Martie! Love this keeper. Hugs~ In the midst of winter.. |
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icebox Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 4383in the shadows |
*grinnnnn* This is SOOOO good! (if you are interested, make a note that there will be a "blue moon" in July on the 31st. *smile*   |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
About that moon, Cpat...thought about it and took moon word totally out of poem. I wonder if you can still tell if the moon really is the light...or something, or someone else? |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
Hey Martie! I loved the same lines as Ron... "if you won't let me fall for you |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
love this...love this one |
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Nightshade
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
My goodness yet again Martie! Wow. Chris "At the touch of love everyone becomes a poet." |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Heh...send me the other one, too. I want 'em both. |
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James_A_Fraser Senior Member
since 2003-09-03
Posts 972Out Making Anticlines |
The answers are: Yes, and both. I also like it better without the moon. I think it only reaches its full meaning, its full depth, without. Given a poem of this strength, there's no need to include something that really is a little too much used these days. |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Exactly what James said, you tell all without saying the exact words, if that makes sense? Beautiful Martie. |
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GG Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532Lost in thought |
I do know this questioning, longing maybe.. wondering.. upon late night awakenings. Well said. Always, Alyssa He was a man of sorrows |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Sister~ I like EVERYTHING you do with the moon, no matter what you call it~ Can't be overdone in my honest little poetic opinion~ Love you ... love your writing~ *Huglets* ~*Marge*~ ~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost, |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Then you nosed in to every opening with your light so sharp it had points I'm understanding this Martie. I'm keeping it. Beauty of the world which is soon to perish has two edges, one of laughter and one of anguish, cutting the heart asunder. |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
Martie - you have beautiful ways of writing of feelings... BC |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Martie, I was going to quote the same part that Maree did. That really reached out to me. Hugs Ethel |
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icequeen Senior Member
since 2001-12-09
Posts 633FL USA |
You had already cancelled the stars. Ahhhhhh well now... here I am again at one of your poems and I am speechless with wonder. I could just fall into it. Hugs Caroline |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Only you can write of this...like this! Great write Martie...Hugs to ya. |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
I read this yesterday, but the werk monster was chomping at me... then I went home last night and started reading... stopped in delight when for the second time in one day, I read heavenly light described as sharp. *S* The book wasn't nearly this beautiful, though. *S* I didn't see it before the edit... but I'd answer your questions yes... and yes. *S* |
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Sadelite Member Elite
since 2003-10-11
Posts 2519 |
With your tenacity you made shadows in my dark. Loved the whole poem, but this stayed with me. Enjoyed, Sadelite |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
(big hugggsssssss) This is so very beautifully touching, sweet friend, this made me cry as I understand this yearning ever so much and I believe both cry during times like these! (sigh) God Bless You, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Martie, thank you for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton "You'll find something that's enough to keep you |
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