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Open Poetry #30
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Views from a Passenger Window
| Open Poetry #30 |
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Views from a Passenger Window |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion 
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Cranes for Hire stand at inattention, orange paint peeling from their angled spires. Eppie’s neon sign spells PIE’s, man with beer squats against a cinder block wall, bars on windows, a bar on the corner, two smokers huddled in the doorway, graffiti on a passing rail car -- rural murals in robin’s egg blue. Flashing red, then white, lights flicker past in silence, no siren’s need, bodies pour out of the Bud plant, scent of hops floats up in a stream of steam; next comes the causeway we joke that it’s called that just ‘cuz; landscape becomes paddies painted as wetlands, white birds posing on small stilts, egrets with dinner on their minds; across the bridge into farmland, suddenly, surprisingly serene, a fleeting shock of emerald and bare trees on hillsides, while along a frontage road, Eucalypti branches droop, heavy and dripping with rain. [This message has been edited by Corinne (12-21-2003 06:07 PM).] |
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| © Copyright 2003 Corinne - All Rights Reserved | |||
Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Cor. Masterfully written, the mood so evident in the words...I felt like I was there for the ride. Well done! |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Absolutely. I felt that "highway buzz" reading this--a road trip revealed in your words. awesome Corinne. |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Hi Cor! This is fantastic...the imagery filled with vivid colour. Love this very much indeed...well done! ~Let peace begin with me... |
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Alicat Member Elite
since 1999-05-23
Posts 4094Coastal Texas |
The picture painted here is superb, a true 'slice-of-life' poem simply about things observed. Me liked muchly. |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Corinne...You have described so well a place I'm sure I've been. Remarkable poem! |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
Thanks everyone for your kind words! Core |
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Sadelite Member Elite
since 2003-10-11
Posts 2519 |
Wow, you covered a lot of images in just a short time--how mood will travel... |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
I was in the back seat thanks for the trip |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
"next comes the causeway we joke that it’s called that just ‘cuz;" Gave me a morning smile...thanks. It's always interesting to see the view through another's eyes. Thanks, Corinne M |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
...heading home for Christmas... the passengers always get to see more. Well done, Corinne. I took the trip with you twice. |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
Corrine, you forgot to mention Toerag mooning the passersby. I can understand why. A sight like that is something the mind automatically shuts out. I enjoyed the other scenes though. |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
Hi Sadelite -- yes, especially as the view changes! Hi Passing Shadows -- was that you?  AM nakdthoughts - thanks! I was worried folks might not get that line! We have a sick habit of talking like that all the time, looking for some word play or another! Sunshine - took the trip twice, that's more than I could hope for, thank you! Ah! LngJhn - long time no see! Oh, that Toe! And now they've gone and named a car after him! I did have his mooning in the poem, but remembered this is a "G" rated site! Hehe! Corinne |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
as fast as the car flies Core. . . as fast as the car flies. . . superb. . . -------------------------------------------------------------- I am tired . . . |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
Thank you Sven! Corinne |
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