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dingusjr
Member

since 2003-09-24

Posts 415
Missouri

0 posted 2003-11-21 03:42 PM

Clouds of tiny birds
Swirl like falling leaves
At the construction site.

It's a fine looking building,
Solid stone in front.
But do we really need
more rental office space?

And when all the fields and trees are gone
Where will the rabbits and the squirrels live?
Not to mention the swirling clouds of tiny birds.

[This message has been edited by dingusjr (11-21-2003 03:52 PM).]

angelblueyes
Member Elite

since 2003-07-19

Posts 2148
Oklahoma

1 posted 2003-11-21 03:45 PM

This saddens my

for soon there will be no place safe for the animals to be free and rid of these terrible things.Well written.
Crystal

Kazm
Member

since 2003-11-13

Posts 99

2 posted 2003-11-21 03:56 PM

This is written like haiku, very tight but open in all directions. I like that in any poem.

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant

since 2000-04-26

Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium

3 posted 2003-11-21 03:58 PM

a thought-provoking write...

liked it...

regards
sudhir

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

4 posted 2003-11-21 04:40 PM

You open with a striking picture and end with a poignant question... I like this very much! *S*

Ratleader

Member Rara Avis

since 2003-01-23

Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass

5 posted 2003-11-21 08:48 PM

Got an idea.....we'll rent 'em the office space....squirrels can stow nuts above the accoustical ceilings, birds nesting in the mail slots, rabbits nibbling the astroturf carpets....yeah....

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

dingusjr
Member

since 2003-09-24

Posts 415
Missouri

6 posted 2003-11-21 09:38 PM

yea...no wonder you are called Rat. haha

Pilgrimage
Member Elite

since 2001-12-04

Posts 3945
Texas, USA

7 posted 2003-11-22 10:54 PM

I enjoyed this one, it was clear and concise, and the images were evocative. Birds seem to adapt well, it's the squirrels and the rabbits I worry about.

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

8 posted 2003-11-23 04:14 AM

yep...nicely said

SharaRose
Member Elite

since 2003-07-19

Posts 2501
Somewhere out there~

9 posted 2003-11-23 11:45 AM

Yeah...that's right. You tell 'em. I think we have enough eateries, and cinema's and shopping to last for eons. Now let us wilderness one's have our day!!! Walking in the woods on the river bank seeing nature at play, smelling the aroma of the pines, and flowers that grace the thicket to remind of the softer, gentler side of life. It's no wonder why I love nature...it's God's personal touch of kindness in the madness man creates for themselves. loved this more than words can say so I will stop now.

Love,
Terri~

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