Open Poetry #29 |
Only A Room |
Kazm Member
since 2003-11-13
Posts 99 |
Only A Room I came too late to say goodbye. No need to knock and hear the hollow confirmation that you left an hour ago, the part of you that did leave, and now this door leads only to a room among the other rooms. There is no paradise inside, no love, no lover. If I did go in, if I could, it would echo me but you are gone. And so I stop here so close that I can feel the emptiness behind the door and wait for -- wait for nothing I can name. If I try I can still see the door opening to you, hear your parting steps, watch you pause and turn back wistfully to look for one last time the way I'm looking now. Did you see me then, close your eyes to catch a memory, see my face as I see yours? There's a fresh fall of leaves and yes there are the traces, I can see your very steps, the turn, and carefully I follow, put my feet just where you did, feel your parting sigh. I turn back, my heart too full to watch you drive away. And this door, our door, if I did go in, if I could, would I still find a trace, some clinging shade of you some incidental mark you left behind? I won't know. By now they've changed the codes, my key would never work. And I don't want it to. Kaz Murakami |
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© Copyright 2003 Kaz Murakami - All Rights Reserved | |||
Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
I must have missed your first post, so let me tell you now, welcome to Passions!! Wonderfully done. "if you won't let me fall for you |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
The love and longing in this are breathtaking... beautiful work! *S* |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Wonderful piece of work Kaz! Very much enjoyed the read. Hugs~ ~I've loved you forever, in lifetimes before~ |
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Justbleu Member Elite
since 1999-08-31
Posts 3329Oregon, Originally From Alaska :) |
Excellent piece of poetry..... And this door, our door, if I did go in, if I could, would I still find a trace, some clinging shade of you some incidental mark you left behind? I won't know. By now they've changed the codes, my key would never work. And I don't want it to. Hope to read more from you!!!! Welcome To Passions!!!! Bridgette "Somewhere, somehow, it should be possible to touch someone and never let go again. To hold someone, not for a moment but forever." Unknown |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
Yes! What Justbleu said! ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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wintertao Member
since 2003-11-17
Posts 366Okaloosa Island, FL |
Excellent work! |
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yv Senior Member
since 2003-05-30
Posts 574 |
Beautiful. 'Tis a painful memory, the silent goodbye of a loved one. This poem hurts. I love this hurt, however. It sends chills down my spine. Every word brought forth a breath of truth and sadness that is almost hard to bear. But, I love the truth in your words. Thank you for opening up my eyes further to the profound mysteries of love. I, falling in love for the first time, am now able to see what may await me in the future. And with this poem, I accept it. Stay true. Member, yv [This message has been edited by yv (11-17-2003 09:23 PM).] |
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steavenr Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058 |
You have captured that heartache of ambivalence that we experience when those who are near to us depart from us. Nice, heartfelt read. |
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Magic Solias Member
since 2003-11-08
Posts 73California, USA |
powerful! Magic Solias |
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