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Open Poetry #29
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Kaoru
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892
where the wild flowers grow

0 posted 2003-10-21 11:55 PM


My bones creak..inside of me,
and only I can hear them.
The queer fog rises in the east,
yet the west heaves dry heat.
We stand in a nuetral position,
where it is crisp and warm in sync..
We've prayed to the restlessness, and fallen asleep,
right in between.

You say in subconcious reply,
of how you live in a tear you once cried,
on a Sunday afternoon..
How false your skin has become to me,
and my own.
I must sigh at my own inability to respond,
perhaps I too, have fallen in love.

I humor myself, and make wishes on
misplaced eyelashes.
You only turn to me in remorse for
those false idols,
that crush the leaves as they walk over bridges..
as if they were gods..
They tempt the vine that bears fruit so
intertwining and ..in disgust it
writes sonnets to further explain it's worship.

In our troubled attempt
to find laughter.. I wake
to realize this
is only sleep.
And still my bones creak.

© Copyright 2003 Meghan Armitage - All Rights Reserved
KoKo
Senior Member
since 2003-02-15
Posts 995
Inside the shadow's shadow
1 posted 2003-10-21 11:59 PM


Loved the last part, but this was my fave:

You say in subconcious reply,
of how you live in a tear you once cried,
on a Sunday afternoon..
How false your skin has become to me,
and my own.
I must sigh at my own inability to respond,
perhaps I too, have fallen in love.

That was amazing.

Rosebud1229
Senior Member
since 2000-04-05
Posts 1813
North Carolina
2 posted 2003-10-22 12:03 PM


Kaoru very emotional I can relate to the tears, so well written. Rose
pandonov
Member
since 2003-10-03
Posts 478
b/w conscience and insolence
3 posted 2003-10-22 01:14 AM


your imagery...it flows, sometimes i reread your stuff just for the flow...
inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392
Ohio
4 posted 2003-10-22 06:34 AM



In our troubled attempt
to find laughter.. I wake
to realize this
is only sleep.
And still my bones creak.

i know this too

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
5 posted 2003-10-22 11:21 AM


"In our troubled attempt
to find laughter.. I wake
to realize this
is only sleep.
And still my bones creak."

If you put all your stuff in a book...I would be first in line to buy it and get you to sign it.

Susan

"if you won't let me fall for you
then you won't see the best that I would love to do for you"
~Dido~

bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

6 posted 2003-10-22 12:53 PM


Drinking windows is always painful.
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
7 posted 2003-10-22 12:55 PM


stunning....just an awesome write...love the ending lines
Ericc
Member Elite
since 2003-01-31
Posts 4178

8 posted 2003-10-22 01:08 PM


Oh wow...!!!
Not much more I can say but..."oh wow!"

Eric

LonelyKitty
New Member
since 2003-10-22
Posts 2

9 posted 2003-10-22 01:47 PM


Amazing poem!  It dripped of emotion.  I especially loved the ending lines!  Absolutely amazing!

Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

10 posted 2003-10-22 05:58 PM


Jeez, no words really, just Jeez.

I'm keeping it.

Maree

fate is not just
whose cooking  smells good
but which way the wind blows

(Ani DiFranco)


Aenimal
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350
the ass-end of space
11 posted 2003-10-22 11:11 PM


you have such incredible images and rhythm..

..and then one day you find..ten years have got behind you..no one told you when to run..you missed the starting gun..

Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
12 posted 2003-10-23 12:20 PM




(big hugggssssssss) Oh Meghan, my heart goes out to you, sweet friend, I can feel the anguish in your words and I hope now your bones feel comfort and you can rest only on stained glass! (sigh) God Bless You, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Meghan, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

I don't need no proof when it comes to God and truth
I can see the sun set and I perceive

***Live***

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