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Open Poetry #29
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Night Train
| Open Poetry #29 |
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Night Train |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla 
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Night Train There are no words that can explain The night train of my dreams of blain The suffering, the whoosh of time The shadow of the pantomime The ache that over takes my heart The beginning, the end of start The cascade water riots rush The horror of the thoughts and flush The terror of the acid spill The seething of the blisters will And sorry will not end the night Or clean the feathers of the flight. And though I dip the changing brew I cannot sooth the thought of you Nor can I make a words amend To round the bend and make an end And so I die an arrows flight And disappear into the night |
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| © Copyright 2003 Seymour Tabin - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
That was some ride! Gosh, you really do need to half a nice cup of hot milk with some vanilla and honey, before you hit the sack at night! Your writing was so incredibly descriptive that I felt as though I was on that "Night Train" with you! Begone, mares of night! Only sweet dreams for my sweetie pie tumbleweed!  Sey, you're one fine poet!  Linda [This message has been edited by Earth Angel (10-17-2003 09:08 AM).] |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Earth Angel And you are one sweet Angel.  |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Hey Sy Good images throughout. You're problem is ....not enough brew...... Eric your 5 cent therapist..... Seriously a real good write....Love the title! Ain't doin nothin at all |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
ethome Your comments are a pleasure. Thank you |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
You've got to shoot those arrows straight and true in the new daylight towards the blue...  Good morning, Sy! |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
"And though I dip the changing brew I cannot sooth the thought of you Nor can I make a words amend To round the bend and make an end And so I die an arrows flight And disappear into the night" Morning Sy! Oooh this one calls for a special blend this morn. It's ready and I'll pour. Loved the read today. ~morning hugs & tea, Nancy~ ~Autumn, the year's last, loveliest smile~ |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
The cascade water riots rush The horror of the thoughts and flush ~~~~~~~ The terror of the acid spill The seething of the blisters will And sorry will not end the night Or clean the feathers of the flight. =============================== Look at you making poetry rock and roll... You got your own rhyme riot going on here Sy-babes and as aching and blistering as this rhyme ride is...it's just so cleverly written that it makes me smile at the poet who wrote it.  The cascade water riots rush The horror of the thoughts and flush You are the King of way cool couplets!! Now get off that train..get on Randy and get over here for raspberry tea. LOL How about a horse carriage ride under the Arch? I know a gray dapple that will steal Randys heart. *winkiewinkie*    |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
Laughing at JM's "rhyme riot" which is so true... M |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Sunshine Good morning love. Hugs Nancy, sounds good to me, be right over. JM, It's raspberry tea for me and Randy can share some oats with the dapple. WWRS |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Maureen, Thanks for the comment and read. [This message has been edited by Seymour Tabin (10-17-2003 09:36 AM).] |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Sy....Hearing the train at night is such a lonely feeling..why is that? The imagery in this aching poem is so beautiful. Loved it! |
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angelblueyes Member Elite
since 2003-07-19
Posts 2148Oklahoma |
Sy, I remember the nights when I lived by the track and would listen to the trains at night.This was awesome. Crystal |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Martie Thank you sweety. angelblueyes Enjoyed your comment, thanks. |
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Suetang Member Ascendant
since 2001-03-07
Posts 5187Melbourne, Australia |
Fabulous writing here Seymour. Take care.......Sue I am in motion |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Always enjoy your words....never ceasing to give us a morsel, each one different from the last. |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Barry, Sometimes a morsel is better then a loaf. Suetang Thank you so much for the read and reply. |
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