Open Poetry #28 |
Brother Balladeer's Church-Our Lady Of Perpetual Motion |
Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
Bally teaches Sunday School, With an annointed touch Tells kids the Bible stories, A job he loves so much. The kids all look up to him, He's such a "Godly" man, For wisdom and great advice Or if they're in a jam. Late one summer evening, The preacher's wife had phoned, "Balladeer I'm all alone Will you come to my home?" Balladeer got up and dressed, Hopped right into his car, And drove to the preacher's house, It wasn't very far. She said: "Let's get a bite to eat, at Toerag's bar and grill, If you'll drive and bring us back, I'll pick up the bill." She said: "Let's order cocktails, A few of those strong drinks" Bally said; "No way I can What would my school kids think?" She offered a cigarette, Bal asked "Is this a joke? I teach kids at Sunday School, That it's a sin to smoke." They consumed a gourmet meal Toerag prepared for them, She said let's mosie down the street To the Holiday Inn. They got a room and as you'd guess, They 'sinned' thru-out the night, Got up early next morning Drove home before daylight. Ole Bal was feeling guilty, So he called his buddy Toe, Didn't know what to tell his kids But figured Toe would know. Bal told Toe the whole story, Every detailed part, "I can't face my Sunday School With this sinful heart." Toe said: "Just teach this lesson, (I'm sure you've heard this line) "You don't have to smoke or drink To have a real good time." (Thanks for the "polish" Suthern) |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
No thanks needed...*S* It was shining before I ever peeked! *S* I thoroughly enjoyed this, Toe! *S* And it just goes to show... you've gotta be REAL specific in telling the do's and don'ts... or lack of mention is perceived as permission! LOL Great job! *S* |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Toe, I thought that was a little classy for you. LOL |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
It just goestashowya, a woman's touch always makes you shine! Yeah, Suthern! Toe, this was a fine piece of ha-ha writing! lol ad infinitum! EA |
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NewEnglandlazurlu Member Rara Avis
since 2002-01-04
Posts 7470A Mountain Paradise |
You and Michael constantly make me giggle and for that I thank you! This was so enjoyable a read. Hugs, Marti |
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Jason Lyle Senior Member
since 2003-02-07
Posts 1438With my darkling |
LOL! these are my favorite reads. Jason |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
smiling... I may be in need of some spiritual guidance m'self. |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
See...this is why I am agnostic, it's a matter of convenience!! Very funny. Susan C. |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Toe, this is a really well-written and cute poem. You know, though, there are a lot of Sunday School teachers who really do this. Then they teach in such a judgmental way to their students, making them think they'll die and go to hell over the least little thing. I know. Thanks for this message, Sir. Hugs Ethel |
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Decaflame Senior Member
since 2001-05-11
Posts 1635 |
I'm not sure whether to grin at the poem, or at the fact you've been polished! |
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Justin Genius Member
since 2001-04-02
Posts 85 |
Exactly the reason why Balladeer isn't allowed into the 'Stute anymore! The poor bloke kept preaching and preaching and preaching... I like the way you tell this tale much better! Got some spare time Sunday? |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Toe Guilt will get ya every time...enjoyed the lesson in this! |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
If I were a preacher The first thing I would do Would be to write a simple prayer And say it just for you. I'd say, "Dear Lord, forgive him The error of his ways. His brain is rotting very quick The way a fruit decays. Forgive him for not making sense. He has a small disease... Forgive him when he screams out All those filthy blasphemies. Forgive the verses that he writes And says is poetry. It's not his fault that he imagines He is really me. Forgive the way he always is A pain in my behind Insulting me and hurting me Hmmmm..hey, God! NEVER MIND!!!!" ya done good here, leopard lips...you been practicing??? |
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Ceinwyn Member Elite
since 2000-07-09
Posts 2175VA |
If at first you don't succeed destroy all the evidence that you tried. |
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