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Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

0 posted 2003-09-16 06:17 PM

Requiem played…
        Transcending the fugue of grey
         Resplendent robes of scarlet graced
         Low sumac as it marched short stepped
Awry in bends
                       The way to another summer end

Too the wayward crop of stone
       Found itself in drape of ivy spread
          No longer green but not yet dead
              The dirge of frost to strum
Notes splayed on slow four time
              Processional gatherings
Incensed to the smell of oak

I weep
    Sweet sap from veins

“ I did not cry at your leaving me here.”

Congealing as resin

“I sobbed”

And am bound

Soon the tops of tree
         Will light
Then flame
Without warmth
As if foxfire to haunt

Then fade

From here…
   The water burns sunset hues
         as I

Remember
                                                                  you

gemjop
Member Elite

since 2002-11-18

Posts 2587
Pencilveinia, USA

1 posted 2003-09-16 06:22 PM

Ron, take a bow, this was magnificent!!(love that word)

You are consistent in your weave of magic words.

Instant karma's gonna get you.

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

2 posted 2003-09-16 06:24 PM

I once wrote a dirge...
Not as well as this,
of course,
but I like the way
your mind works.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

3 posted 2003-09-16 06:46 PM

"Soon the tops of tree
         Will light
Then flame
Without warmth
As if foxfire to haunt

Then fade

From here…
   The water burns sunset hues
         as I

Remember
                                                                  you"

Only you could have written this Ron...
Wonderful...another keeper..into the file named 'Captain's'.

~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~

~ I love your glances meeting mine
across forever or the room ~

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-12-27

Posts 8348
Florida

4 posted 2003-09-16 08:28 PM

Perfect!!

Susan

MARK V SHELDON
Member Elite

since 2001-06-21

Posts 3015
In a corporeal internship...

5 posted 2003-09-16 11:52 PM

How to reply to this and not sound trite... Deeply stirring and relate-leaving impression, especially the last three lines which say everything necessary. Interesting, the duality of the words "fall" and "leaves"...

-MVS

You CAN make a difference:
http://educate-yourself.org/

angelblueyes
Member Elite

since 2003-07-19

Posts 2148
Oklahoma

6 posted 2003-09-16 11:58 PM

WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Crystal

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

7 posted 2003-09-17 12:45 PM

Requiem played…
        Transcending the fugue of grey
         Resplendent robes of scarlet graced
         Low sumac as it marched short stepped
Awry in bends
                       The way to another summer end

Too the wayward crop of stone
       Found itself in drape of ivy spread
          No longer green but not yet dead
              The dirge of frost to strum
Notes splayed on slow four time
              Processional gatherings
Incensed to the smell of oak
===========================

ya know that old poem....
"I think that I shall never see a poem as lovely as a tree"

well, thats cuz she never had the pleasure of reading your work.
ya make us tree huggers proud.

"If you see lonely, clear skies turning stormy ...
Lightning strikes and all you see is blue ... this is me missing you"

JH

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

8 posted 2003-09-17 01:10 AM

Masterfully done, Dear Maestro! I enjoyed your orchestration of words, thoughts, and images into this memorable requiem!

EA

LeeJ
Member Patricius

since 2003-06-19

Posts 13296

9 posted 2003-09-17 08:15 AM

Ron, you renounce the privilage of life through your words...this was a masterful write...a symphony of food for the soul and heart....music, sheer significance. Very much enjoyed!

Moon Dust

Member Elite

since 1999-06-11

Posts 2177
Skelmersdale, UK

10 posted 2003-09-17 08:21 AM

wooooh you know how to write a sensual piece.

Loved the last lines

If your afraid of the dark, then why did you come?

[This message has been edited by Moon Dust (09-17-2003 08:22 AM).]

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

11 posted 2003-09-17 11:57 AM

Excellent work... the ending is haunting perfection.

Tiersdin
Member Elite

since 2000-11-17

Posts 2364
east coast

12 posted 2003-09-17 01:28 PM

And memories are wonderful things to treasure, yes?

Beautifully written, Captain.

~Tiers

Paula Finn
Member Ascendant

since 2000-06-17

Posts 5546
missouri

13 posted 2003-09-18 12:18 PM

This is just lovely

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

14 posted 2003-09-18 12:39 PM

Ron...this is an amazing piece of art, my friend.

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