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Open Poetry #28
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exhale
Senior Member
since 2003-06-13
Posts 646
Alberta,Canada

0 posted 2003-09-14 02:00 AM


street lamps
blinded by the harsh,honest light
stop yelling
what did i do wrong
start walking away
thats what you do best
just leave
footsteps in the dark
you're gone

[This message has been edited by exhale (09-14-2003 02:01 AM).]

© Copyright 2003 Chelsea - All Rights Reserved
QjQ
Member Elite
since 2003-04-18
Posts 3756
U.S.A.
1 posted 2003-09-14 03:35 AM


feelings expressed well...

                           

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
2 posted 2003-09-14 12:50 PM


I know someone like this

what they do best, yeah

sigh

mytuesdaywishes
Member
since 2003-09-05
Posts 254
a voice from the musicbox
3 posted 2003-09-15 11:38 PM


ouch...it hurts no matter what. it hurts, but the better person never walks away. you're strong and passionate. keep writing. maybe a little more description and feeling, but keep it real, dont fancy it up too much. make it yours.


JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
4 posted 2003-09-16 04:39 AM


Nice....James
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