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Open Poetry #27

Low Lying Fog

1slick_lady
Member Ascendant

since 2000-12-22

Posts 6088
standing on a shadow's lace

0 posted 2003-06-21 01:54 AM

Low Lying Fog

I have
looked behind
every blade
of grass where
your steps
once laid
I am here
now
you were
there then
just to be where
you have been
touching a ghost
that was
your shape
and breathe
your air
that did escape
grabbing at
just a
mere shadow
in low
lying fog
of empty meadow

Kaoru

Member Elite

since 2003-06-07

Posts 3892
where the wild flowers grow

1 posted 2003-06-21 02:11 AM

Wow, wonderful work here.. As always

Edder
Senior Member

since 2003-04-02

Posts 671

2 posted 2003-06-21 02:13 AM

ahhh, to breathe the scent of you in the air...wonderful write.

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-11-18

Posts 7350
the ass-end of space

3 posted 2003-06-21 02:14 AM

sighs and hugs i'm off to sleep its safer there

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

4 posted 2003-06-21 03:29 AM

always in awe of you

Local Rebel
Member Ascendant

since 1999-12-21

Posts 5767
Southern Abstentia

5 posted 2003-06-21 11:15 AM

I didn't really know how to read this --which is good. I could interpret it in two different ways.

Either one works well.

One is missing someone from our own life -- which could be anyone -- a lover, a friend, a parent, child, mentor..... it is universal in the way you've penned it -- that's marvelous.

The other is the feeling invoked when standing in a place of historical significance where some historical figure may have been -- which is also a very valid feeling.

I read it both ways and it worked perfectly.

Thank you.

Artic Wind
Member Rara Avis

since 2007-09-16

Posts 8080
Realm of Supernatural

6 posted 2008-07-30 05:20 PM

This is a very interesting write!-- Very much Enjoyed!

ARCTIC WIND

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