Open Poetry #27 |
Fractured Beauty |
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Fractured Beauty "Kick the door down, Deliver it to me, autographed, And opposite yourself from what WE see." Is it that easy? Sounds like more of a lobotomy When mind of soul is fractured, real, And candle’s light flames Passion’s zeal Where voices break, reside inside, Finding need for seek, and hide It’s why the Chalk Garden Grows the roses never promised To stark the red against the white And why I stray from dark of night Whose path might lead to discontent And like a page, the mind is bent Kick it down The voices mutter, so Like a diver breaking surface to splutter, To gasp at air that’s owned by sky Floating in the horizon’s eye A floating mind is like a sigh. Where are the edges, scraped of flint? Are they behind the scarlet tint Of the darker edge of night Where the high ropewalk is Done sans tights And the mind is fractured beauty A study of disgruntlement... Who says the strange are but a few? When the mirror shows me You? [This message has been edited by Sunshine (07-26-2003 06:33 PM).] |
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© Copyright 2003 Karilea Rilling Jungel - All Rights Reserved | |||
Nightshade
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
Oooh, I got chills from this one!! Excellent Karilea! hugs, Chris "At one glance |
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angelblueyes Member Elite
since 2003-07-19
Posts 2148Oklahoma |
Karilea, this one was great.Very well done. angelblueyes |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Excellent Karilea..a bit different style for you...but much enjoyed. ~Hugs~ ~The breeze that kissed you on the face, |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
This is wondermous, absolutely! I love this style from you Karilea. More please. Maree fate is not just |
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Patricia Member Elite
since 2003-04-06
Posts 2160Missouri |
"Kick the door down, Deliver it to me, autographed, And opposite yourself from what WE see." Is it that easy? Sounds like more of a lobotomy Hmmm, K. This sounds very familar to me...seems this is where I got so lost in my journey to becoming me. I've come a long way in past 2 years! A very interesting write...I am thinking! Patricia |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
YES!!! Those opening lines? well, they ARE me!!! and I can't tell you how much I love the "deliver it to me autographed" line... well? actually, I COULD tell ya, but if the narration is as boring as the story, I wouldn't do ya that. smile... beautiful work sissy. |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Karilea, you met the challenge very well!! Aren't these hhard to write? Mine sure was. |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
Now this is what I'm talkin bout! God, Karilea . . . *holding ice to eye* xxoo |
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ThisDiamond Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353Michigan, USA |
Much intensity, and looking great on you. What wonderful lines you have written here. TD |
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vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
Oh yes...I'm liking this VERY MUCH! Some way cool lines in this one. Lovin' the darker side of the Sun. Hugs, ~Vicky "My friends are my estate." |
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brian sites Senior Member
since 2002-06-25
Posts 1475usa |
YEOW! yes yes needs more of this rappin' damn you are multiplaned reading again...... |
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Wind
since 2002-10-12
Posts 2981 |
I really, really Liked this one |
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