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Open Poetry #27
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Professor Gloom
Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082
of Depression

0 posted 2003-07-22 07:54 AM


The tattered curtains, swaying like an old drugged whore,
Once gave privacy, but hides nothing anymore,
Children did played there, now the time of play has passed
Only rats scurry midst the pile of trash and glass;
When tomorrow comes so comes demolition ball,
With trucks to carry soon there’ll be nothing at all
But tonight it stands with a single candlelight
Cooking a white horse to ride her veins through the night,
Blood rushes pleasure as she staggers to the street
Leaning on the lamp with a far off smile to greet.
Cars streaking by her can’t see her of yesterday
Just bruised skin and bone as they quickly speed away.
Morning finds her there since she’s nowhere else to go,
She had a somewhere, in a sometime long ago,
But the trucks are there, to take all to the landfill,
The tattered curtains, blow away to where they will
On warm summer breeze, just another gutter bit,
To clog the street drains when the next thunderstorms hit.
Before the setting sun it is a smooth vacant lot
The work quickly done, the place can now be forgot;
In the warm twilight she shakes as if November
She had a somewhere, if she could just remember,
Mind and body gone, she walks though can barely stand
To find her white horse, with silver spoon in her hand;
The curb make her fall the gutter becomes her bed,
Beside a parked car, tattered curtains for her head.
Another morning and she’s not there to be found,
Just a rag and spoon, left there laying on the ground.

Gloom


© Copyright 2003 Aszard Drazlom - All Rights Reserved
Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
1 posted 2003-07-22 08:05 AM


Professor,
Excellent, one of your best.

Professor Gloom
Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082
of Depression
2 posted 2003-07-22 08:16 AM


Thank you, Seymour,
Pleased you enjoyed

Gloom

Chanson
Senior Member
since 2000-08-19
Posts 1559
Up Creek w/Out Paddle
3 posted 2003-07-22 09:24 AM


Your first line set the tone, a vivid construct, or should I say deconstruction? Your words tumble nicely, Prof.

I bought my share of mistakes so I might see some interest.
~Dorene

Nightshade
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962
just out of reach
4 posted 2003-07-22 10:48 AM


Morning finds her there since she’s nowhere else to go,
She had a somewhere, in a sometime long ago,

Very sad write Professor. You write well of the lonely, one way street called Drug Abuse. Very well done and going into my library. hugs, Chris

"At one glance
I love you
With a thousand hearts."


— Mihri Hatun, Turkish poet  

    

Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
5 posted 2003-07-22 11:17 AM


Sad, that this scene is played out all too often.
A good write, Professor.

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
6 posted 2003-07-22 01:20 PM


sad...so sad, I love it
Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
7 posted 2003-07-22 02:39 PM


Dearest Gloomy one,

This is a beautifully sad story of someone I am truly glad I am not.  Well done.

Susan C.

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
8 posted 2003-07-22 03:09 PM


Professor, you often show the less than beautiful side of life--and that is a good thing. You cast a light where it is often needed. You expose the invisible, the unseen and the hidden.

You are a keen observer of life--and death.

Love & Light,
EA

Kaoru
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892
where the wild flowers grow
9 posted 2003-07-22 08:55 PM


Well, this is the first I've actually read from you, Professor,
and I just loved it!

Mysteria
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Member Laureate
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
10 posted 2003-07-23 03:27 AM


One of my greatest wishes is to someday see those streets but then again I do - through your descriptive poetry.  This was simply a spectacular piece of writing.
Professor Gloom
Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082
of Depression
11 posted 2003-07-23 08:51 AM


Thank you, Chanson (mfff),
Seems my construction of rhyme is often of
Destruction of society,
Glad you liked the tumble.

Thank you, Nightshade,
My city ranks High in drug abuse,
Crack and Heroin the primary offenders,
And I know these streets well enough by looking out my barred windows,
Pleased you liked the look with me.

Thank you, Midnitesun,
Far too often, appreciate you taking the time to respond

Thank you, passing shadows

Thank you, Susan,
I am also glad it is not you and that you took the time to respond,
Unfortunately this is about a real person.

Thank you, Earth Angel,
T’is true, my view are often not the pretty one,
But I’m not a particular pretty person, but one of the shadows,
So I see this side all the time.
Pleased you enjoyed the view

Thank you, Kaoru,
You honor me with your praise
You’ll find my subject matter gloomy
But I do attempt to write with some style.

Thank you, Mysteria,
Let me know, I’ll be your guide young lady.

Gloom

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