Open Poetry #27 |
![]() ![]() |
Twice Removed |
![]() ![]() ![]() |
BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside ![]() |
It's time to let go succumbing to my weakening falling through an abyss, building walls to carve my history, privately. Please don't look down deeply it is murky under the surface filled with silt, and cruddy quicksand that threatens my well being. I fear the slipping away compiled with anxiety and the unnatural decent swallowing gravity. I've enclosed the pain wedged precariously into a space where my heart begs but cannot feel any longer. I'm lacking the strength to go up against you, I won't afford to fight the battle that might leave me crippled after the white flag's been raised. Twice removed for the sake of survival I have searched long and hard for a clearing in the mirror and still, the smoke burns my eyes. Bracing myself for the letting down my hands, red and worn my heart running off into the darkness to bleed. ~*~ [This message has been edited by BluesSerenade (06-14-2003 03:14 AM).] |
||
© Copyright 2003 BluesSerenade - All Rights Reserved | |||
Kaoru![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892where the wild flowers grow |
I love this poem ![]() |
||
devinechild22 Senior Member
since 2002-08-28
Posts 571 |
I LOVED the images you supplied in this poem! I really liked how you personified your heart and made it run away. Very kool write and I enjoyed reading it to the fullest! *Allison* |
||
BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
Thank you Kaoru, and devinechild. I'm having another one of my spells, and it feels just awful. I almost think I should be apologizing for even writing this. I thank you both for lifting my spirits. |
||
mirror man Senior Member
since 2001-01-08
Posts 814 |
Okay, now I understand. I couldn't imagine anything making you feel like this. Get well soon, even though you write it well. |
||
inkedgoddess Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392Ohio |
very forlorn, so sad, sweet blondielocks |
||
Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Oh Lori..this just aches! But, an excellent write as always. Be well...be happy... ~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~ ~Somewhere in my heart I'm always |
||
QjQ Member Elite
since 2003-04-18
Posts 3756U.S.A. |
fabulous write,,, QjQ |
||
icebox Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 4383in the shadows |
"I've enclosed the pain wedged precariously where my heart begs but cannot bare to feel any longer." I have been in this space. Somewhere down low, near one of the support beams, you might see my name scratched into the dingy plaster. There is a doorway out. It hides in plain sight. Write it out, friend. You are doing well with pieces like this. |
||
BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
Oh "Man"~ Thank you for the get well wishes, have no fear, I'm a fast healer. ![]() Girlielocks~ ![]() Thank you Nancy~ It only hurts in the meantime. QJ~ I appreciate it. icebox~ I look forward to your wise words, and I thank you for them. |
||
garysgirl![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Lori, this is sad, but beautiful, too. Excellent writing, as always. Thanks. ![]() hugs ![]() Ethel |
||
littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
God Bluesy . . . I'm bleeding with you on this one . . . damn damn and mannnn this is a good write sorry you had to - glad you did xxoo tweets |
||
gemjop Member Elite
since 2002-11-18
Posts 2587Pencilveinia, USA |
Lori, good to see u lady, i too have been having one of those spells of gloom and doom, and all you can do is wait, or try and think yourself out of it. which sometimes makes it worse. lol. powerful write, Twice removed for the sake of survival I have searched long and hard for a clearing in the mirror and still, the smoke burns my eyes you write of this so well. hugs to you lady. ![]() love gemma xxx |
||
passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
this is so sad Lori, hugs you |
||
Goldenrose Member Elite
since 2003-05-30
Posts 3665 |
deeply personal. There is darkness here that will end and the sun will shine on you forever.Good luck and thank you for the words. Goldenrose. |
||
Mistletoe Angel![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
![]() (big hugggsssssssss) Well, at leats think of it this way. The key word here is "twice". You were removed "once" before and you made it back and pulled through! So with your courageous heart and strength, you will come back yet again and nothing can ever push you back that easily again, as you are the sun! (sigh) God Bless You, sweet friend, I send angel hugs your way, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Lori, thank you for sharing! ![]() May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton Underneath your clothes, there's an endless story |
||
BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
Sorry about my dark mood. Geeeez! It's a brand new day and the sun is shining, as I knew it would. Thanks to you all! |
||
Saunni Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 1777West Virginia |
Blues, very touching! Very heartfelt! Here's to brighter days always. ![]() Sauni:)The Only Time I See The Sun Is When I'm Within That Vanilla Breeze.The Only Time I'm One With The Sun Is When He Shelters Me From The Rain. L.S |
||
inkedgoddess Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392Ohio |
I've enclosed the pain wedged precariously into a space where my heart begs but cannot feel any longer. that hurts,,,,,,,, good stuff, bluesgirl, from the heart and soul |
||
Local Rebel Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767Southern Abstentia |
ah well -- we all have spells here's to a short one for you... |
||
timothysangel1973![]()
since 2001-12-03
Posts 1725Never close enough |
I hope that this "spell" is a short lived one. Surely a peice of poetry from the deepest part of your inner being. Great Work! Tima C. If you cant get rid of the skeletons in your closet, you'd best teach them how to dance. George Bernard Shaw |
||
Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
Good, Let out your inner thoughts in the mind and soul and heart! ![]() ARCTIC WIND |
||
![]() ![]() |
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
![]() ![]() ![]() |
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |