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Song_for_Serenity
Member

since 2003-05-28

Posts 97
USA

0 posted 2003-07-05 02:02 AM

Mocking temptation
Held in deception's lair
Something so right
Turned radically unfair
Painted facade
Speak saccharine lies
Oh, how I loved you
When you taught me to fly.

Now enter the shadows
And fall into the abyss
But I take one more sip
From that poisonous kiss
Hate. Jealousy. Envy.
Didn't know I could feel.
Broken down, empty
The pain is so real.

Stolen moment reflection
I thought I was strong
Smug cheshire cat
You had to prove me wrong
I take a look in the mirror
At the me that you've made
Grieve empty soul
And watch myself
Fade...

~Angela
"Anything less than mad, passionate love is wasting your time...Life has too many mediocre things in it, love shouldn't be one of them..."

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

1 posted 2003-07-05 02:07 AM

awesome! great presentation on the ending!

Tim
Senior Member

since 1999-06-08

Posts 1794

2 posted 2003-07-05 10:49 AM

Interesting write. nicely done.

Neeraja
Senior Member

since 2002-06-22

Posts 812
The Netherlands

3 posted 2003-07-06 07:26 AM

I enjoyed the read...

Neeraja

ice
Member Elite

since 2003-05-17

Posts 3404
Pennsylvania

4 posted 2003-07-06 08:14 AM

Now you seem but a negative.
The faded picture of your soul,
Needs redevelopement.
A victim of bad circumstance,
Caught in a black hole;
But you will regain your focus
And remember how to live...
*
A fine expression of feelings
....ice....

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

5 posted 2003-07-07 02:54 PM

Excellent ending, m'dear...
very well executed...

papabear
Member

since 1999-09-17

Posts 102
Atlanta, GA

6 posted 2003-07-07 04:20 PM

A pleasure to read

gemjop
Member Elite

since 2002-11-18

Posts 2587
Pencilveinia, USA

7 posted 2003-07-07 04:30 PM

Angela...this is how love gets us hey? i'm there. stunning write hun.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

8 posted 2003-07-07 04:34 PM

Fantastic write!
Love the presentation and the ending fading away.
~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~

~If you haven't heard the sunset,
you haven't been listening.~

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

9 posted 2003-07-08 01:44 PM

Excellent poem with the perfect ending. *S*

chicken
Junior Member

since 2003-07-27

Posts 44

10 posted 2003-07-29 11:32 AM

gr8 poem

IndigoEve
Member

since 2003-01-10

Posts 279
Etched in the illusion of time

11 posted 2003-07-29 04:26 PM

Oh my..this one is beautiful! How do you do it?

I dont know why I didn't reply to it before, but its going into my library now.

For saints have hands that pilgrims' hands do touch,
And palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss.--"Romeo and Juliet"

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