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Open Poetry #26
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"worn hinges"
| Open Poetry #26 |
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"worn hinges" |
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gyiel marlok Member
since 2003-06-08
Posts 145OHIO |
o' my love,don't cast me out feed me the theory.. the hypothesis stands false.. the intrusion we had that day..made me not wanna take any more challenges thrown our way.. it just wears out and is no longer appealing.. the disgust makes me wanna heave away the splinters buried in my fingernails, there were shelves and shelves.. of jars.containing sentences..spat out by sown mouths.. unable to holler out..and destroy the devices that had bound them.. an imprisonment fit for a tortured carcass... dreams would only take them further dreams could only take them further they convinced themselves they were supposed to be punished... parting was such sweet sorrow... sorrow for those who were framed... maybe we deserve to be wiped out... EMANCIPATION we deserve to be let out... haven't seen daylight in years.. they swallowed the key... made it bigger than what it was and banished me... |
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| © Copyright 2003 GYIEL MARLOK - All Rights Reserved | |||
Mistletoe Angel 
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
  (big hugggssssssss) This is a very intense debut, dearest friend, this, my friend, is what makes such wonderful poetry and I only hope now those hinges have gotten some silver washover! (sigh) God Bless You, sweet friend, I love this! Welcome to Passions, sweet friend, may you be inspired by all of us here as we will all be inspired by your lovely words! I can't wait to read more of your lovely words, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Gyiel, thank you for sharing!  May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton Underneath your clothes, there's an endless story |
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gyiel marlok Member
since 2003-06-08
Posts 145OHIO |
to those who read this it is my first post,so be frank please |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
It is not the darkness in your poem that haunts me as much as this did... sown mouths.. unable to holler out..and destroy the devices that had bound them.. and this.. parting was such sweet sorrow... sorrow for those who were framed... Could feel the restraints, and the choke hold in this. *Welcome* gyiel~ |
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laurie Member
since 2003-05-28
Posts 153canada, ontario |
l like, tavis... it's haunting alright, and suits life perfectly. keep writing, my friend, and keep talking. we need u. laurie. ps, welcome to pips. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Gyiel, Welcome to Passions! You have such intensity, and it makes me wonder at your age. If you would like to have a critique message placed into your profile, just visit the Member's Area, and you will see where you can insert a small request for asking for critiques...if you need any help, just let any of the moderators know. In the meantime, Please, check your E-mail for a Special Greeting! Looking forward to reading more of your poetry! Karilea - if I whisper, will you listen? |
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Patricia Member Elite
since 2003-04-06
Posts 2160Missouri |
Today, they see the light of day. Real substance in your words. Much enjoyed. Welcome to Passions. Patricia |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
gyiel - a sincere write of ones thoughts. Nice pen... BC |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
I enjoyed the read. Welcome to Passions! I will be looking for more of your work. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Enjoyed the intensity...James |
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AniKay83 Member
since 2000-06-28
Posts 388Missing Since 1999 |
it just wears out and is no longer appealing.. the disgust makes me wanna heave away the splinters buried in my fingernails, there were shelves and shelves.. of jars.containing sentences..spat out by sown mouths.. ============================================ Great imagery. I can imagine the restraints. Welcome to Passions. www.heybroproductions.com |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
an interesting piece..with strong images pulled out in part perhaps to almost add a shock value to the underlying emotions...and an unusual blend of language... welcome to PIP.. look forward to seeing more. |
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gyiel marlok Member
since 2003-06-08
Posts 145OHIO |
thank you to all who have replyed.it makes the love grow stronger |
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