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Magnus

Member Laureate

since 2001-10-10

Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA

0 posted 2003-06-09 05:42 PM

When the worn latch clicked,
I closed my eyes as darkness
drowned the sight of you, your
eyes fleetingly meeting mine
but for a second.

It could have been the gallows call
to a doomed man, standing in
quiver and quake as the final moment
fell upon the drop of a door.

Or a train’s sudden rush through a crossing
a moment after a step carried peril
to safety.

Now, I sit,misty eyed, counting the dried petals of
a wilting flower.  A cup catches each tear.
The ring of the drop bounding,
rebounding...just as my heart has.

Darkness has fallen upon the porch of
yesterday, where a swing once swung
to the sway of sensual wants.

The hush deafens my ear as an incessant
ring takes sanity away.    Will I again
hear the latch?  And upon the door
opening, see the light yet
again?

The die is cast,  I wait..

[This message has been edited by Magnus (06-09-2003 09:12 PM).]

QjQ
Member Elite

since 2003-04-18

Posts 3756
U.S.A.

1 posted 2003-06-09 05:45 PM

***Darkness has fallen upon the porch of
yesterday, where a swing once swung
to the sway of sensual wants.

liked these lines,,, very good write/read....

Poetry is a vision that portrays ones impressions.QjQ

Brad Majors

Member Elite

since 2001-04-03

Posts 2647
Georgia

2 posted 2003-06-09 05:48 PM

awesome!

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

3 posted 2003-06-09 05:51 PM

Wonderful write Barry!!!
~Hugs & Sniles, Nancy~

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
dancing with you in the summer rain~

Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

4 posted 2003-06-09 10:11 PM

Bravo, Barry! This is very powerful writing. You have taken the nostalgia, sadness and melancholy of the situation and ended it with a glimmer of hope...expertly done. It deserves to be read by many.....

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

5 posted 2003-06-09 10:18 PM

Barry...The closing of the gate...can feel the anguish and the wait...I hope it's not too late!

Patricia
Member Elite

since 2003-04-06

Posts 2160
Missouri

6 posted 2003-06-09 11:02 PM

Oh Barry...don't wait, call out to her in your beautiful words. And you will hear what you desire.

Patricia

Ivy Rose
Senior Member

since 2001-12-29

Posts 1300
MA, USA

7 posted 2003-06-09 11:05 PM

Barry...An extremely moving piece. So beautiful in the honesty of its words. This is the side of Magnus I love to see.

***Ivy Rose

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

8 posted 2003-06-09 11:07 PM

(sigh) Very eerie indeed, dearest friend, reminded me of "Beauty And The Beast" and how the beast seemed hopeless with all the petals falling from the fragile flower before being transformed! (big hugggssssss) God Bless You, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Barry, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

Underneath your clothes, there's an endless story

***Shakira***

Bill Charles
Member Patricius

since 2000-07-11

Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now

9 posted 2003-06-09 11:52 PM

Barry - another great write from your pen...

BC

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

10 posted 2003-06-10 04:27 AM

damn! I'm all misty-eyed

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-12-27

Posts 8348
Florida

11 posted 2003-06-10 03:08 PM

Wow...almost got me...excellant!

Susan

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant

since 2000-04-26

Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium

12 posted 2003-06-10 04:33 PM

This is excellent writing... liked the striking images in this one... feels so close to the heart...

Thanks for sharing...

Regards
sudhir

Larry C

Member Patricius

since 2001-09-10

Posts 10286
United States

13 posted 2003-06-10 10:37 PM

Barry,
It seems your time here(one month after me) has given you more bang for your buck than I got! Wow. I echo the 'deer. Incredibly impressive. Bravo.

If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again.

Suetang
Member Ascendant

since 2001-03-07

Posts 5187
Melbourne, Australia

14 posted 2003-06-10 11:14 PM

Hello Barry

Images so real were seen through your amazing words. You never cease to amaze me with your talent.

Take care.......Sue

I am in motion
I am blue
Love is an ocean
I'm anchored in you
- Shawn Mullins

gyiel marlok
Member

since 2003-06-08

Posts 145
OHIO

15 posted 2003-06-10 11:18 PM

magnus,another one delivered well

garysgirl

Member Laureate

since 2002-09-29

Posts 19237
Florida, USA

16 posted 2003-06-10 11:27 PM

Darkness has fallen upon the porch of
yesterday, where a swing once swung
to the sway of sensual wants.

The hush deafens my ear as an incessant
ring takes sanity away.    Will I again
hear the latch?  And upon the door
opening, see the light yet
again?

The die is cast,  I wait..

Oh Barry, this one really touches the heart.......there is such a longing in the "I wait".  So much hope and desire...
Heart hugs to you, dear Sir

Ethel

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-02-22

Posts 9353
Michigan, USA

17 posted 2003-06-16 10:40 PM

How well you express the depths of longing here...missing...
An amazing write. TD

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