If I Am Defiant(Writing With You In Mind This Time)

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Temptress

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-06-15

Posts 7136
Mobile, AL

0 posted 2003-05-31 08:25 PM

you say defiant
like you are my elder
waiting in the corner
with blows to my palm
for all the things I write
that you don't like.

you stay behind your curtain
trying to sting with words
muffled by the thick guaze
of someone else's voice
and I wonder
when will you use your own.

If I am defiant
then I shall be defiant
with my words
for
I
am no child
and I do not fear your wrath.

Neither your judgement
nor the judgments
of the ones who dwell behind that rotting curtain
can make me any less loved
or make me love any less.

So read
stalk
twist my intentions around in your mind
about everything else
but make no mistake
this time
is intended for your eyes
and I hope you are reading.

Always as ever
civil
and undeterred by threats
and demands.

You could hurt me with your bare hands. You could hurt me using the sharp edge of what you say. JEWEL

1slick_lady
Member Ascendant

since 2000-12-22

Posts 6088
standing on a shadow's lace

1 posted 2003-05-31 09:00 PM

me too and you goooooo girl !!! i am your back-up.

QjQ
Member Elite

since 2003-04-18

Posts 3756
U.S.A.

2 posted 2003-05-31 09:26 PM

twist my intentions around in your mind

very good lines...enjoyed...

It's the quality of the complement that i feel, not the quanity.

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

3 posted 2003-05-31 09:45 PM

neat write

Ivy Rose
Senior Member

since 2001-12-29

Posts 1300
MA, USA

4 posted 2003-05-31 11:39 PM

Temptress...None should judge another's work. For we each have a unique and special voice. I like the way you wrote this poem and you made an excellent point. ***Ivy Rose

icebox
Member Elite

since 2003-05-03

Posts 4383
in the shadows

5 posted 2003-05-31 11:43 PM

Oh...this is SO good.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

6 posted 2003-06-10 01:07 PM

TemptyOne~

'you stay behind your curtain
trying to sting with words
muffled by the thick guaze
of someone else's voice
and I wonder
when will you use your own'

Oh WOW ... let's hope it stung where it should have~

I admire your spirit~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
[email protected]

Selina
Member

since 2003-06-07

Posts 62
Philadelphia, PA, USA

7 posted 2003-06-10 06:00 PM

Very powerful, and well, defiant. I liked it very much.

"If it's true you never loved me, there's no deception as you cry..." --SDaws

Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

8 posted 2003-06-10 06:10 PM

(chuckling) defiant looks good on you.... now..sit down and I'll pour you a cold one...

now..now... don't stare so mean at me..I'm harmless..I just like company while I drink and think... you can talk, I'll listen, and if I offer anything that offends..hey..I'll buy a round again....

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