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Open Poetry #26
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snowpants
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since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061
KS

0 posted 2003-05-27 03:02 AM


Reach me in this moment--while the wind is distracted...
Speak to me of the muted sensations for which I’ve been aching,
Because, even walking in the depths of intended serenity,
It is not completely silent--
Your lingering voice and matching expressions
Relentlessly pilot me elsewhere.
I search for a distinct song--
One to appease my thoughts,
Yet one that will not remind me
Of roads that once brought me to you.

It’s amazing how only a certain kind of music can inspire;
I still can’t comprehend how your presence
Brought me to altitudes I’d never touched--
Even after I thought I’d already beheld my highest.
I’ll always remember how your flame overpowered me--
And I’d already stood before ten thousand immeasurable oceans.

It’s over me...it’s through me...it’s within me...
I only want to feel the familiar passion
That certain combination of numbers gave to us
On a July night that should have been diminished by rain.
It was only because of your peace of mind--
Your tranquil composure--
That I mustered the ability to leave you standing there each time,
Not knowing when your eyes’ storm would reach me again...

-kh '03


out past the fountain I left by the station,
I start the day in the usual way,
then think well, why not, and stop for a coffee and begin to recall things that you say...

just a hang-up call and the quiet breathing of our persian we call cajun on a wednesday...


[This message has been edited by snowpants (05-27-2003 03:12 AM).]

© Copyright 2003 snowpants - All Rights Reserved
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
1 posted 2003-05-27 03:07 AM


this is one of those 'mood poems'
jjote
Senior Member
since 2002-12-25
Posts 1088
Ontario, Canada
2 posted 2003-05-27 03:24 AM


Hmm. love your title, and this part brings one to a reminiscing mood:
"I search for a distinct song--
One to appease my thoughts,
Yet one that will not remind me
Of roads that once brought me to you."



serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

3 posted 2003-05-27 03:26 AM


astonishing read.

And I don't think it's my mood.

As I read any poem, there is a visual(audio?) of some kind that sorta pops in my head regarding the overall theme and tone. Here, with this, it was the ocean shore at night, exactly being that gentle and cleansing. AND that hypnotic.

As usual, my mind travels. And? I thank you for the ticket.


Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

4 posted 2003-05-27 07:57 AM


It’s amazing how only a certain kind of music can inspire;
I still can’t comprehend how your presence
Brought me to altitudes I’d never touched--
Even after I thought I’d already beheld my highest.
I’ll always remember how your flame overpowered me--
And I’d already stood before ten thousand immeasurable oceans.


It’s over me...it’s through me...it’s within me...
I only want to feel the familiar passion
That certain combination of numbers gave to us
On a July night that should have been diminished by rain.
It was only because of your peace of mind--
Your tranquil composure--
That I mustered the ability to leave you standing there each time,
Not knowing when your eyes’ storm would reach me again...
=============================

Well, well do me mothy eyes deceive me???
How cool to find frosty britches poetry here. LOL
Ya know this is one of me faves..moth anthem girlie..and (YKTIKTYKIK)


and this line...

I’ll always remember how your flame overpowered me--
And I’d already stood before ten thousand immeasurable oceans.



OH YEAH...that is a iwishihadwrotethat kinda line.

as always..I am loving your imagery and personification and of course your classic style of vocabulary inhanced poetry..
My mind needs the stimulation LOL

Very cool K-girlie
now write me on called Schwimgin in your schtomach hehe

Darkness cannot drive out darkness ... only light can do that.
Hate cannot drive out hate ... only love can do that.
MLK

Ratleader
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass
5 posted 2003-05-27 09:48 AM


An excursion into the art of poetry....words and imagery both very original. And the central one -- wind distracted -- I keep thinking about that...know that exact characteristic but never thought of it in quite that way before...

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
6 posted 2003-05-27 11:50 AM


Snowpants

It's good to see you...and this poem from the depth of feeling (like oceans they are).

Midnitesun
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Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
7 posted 2003-05-27 12:35 PM


Absolutely stunning!
I'm keeping this treasure, and will no doubt enjoy it several times over.
THANK YOU for sharing.

snowpants
Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061
KS
8 posted 2003-05-27 09:36 PM


ps:  thanks for the read and your reply, but I'd have to say that the feelings behind this were definitely more than a "mood"...but I do appreciate the reply!

jjote:  thanks...I haven't been titling my writes as of late, but thanks for the compliment...I appreciate it!

serenity:  you hit the nail on the head...hypnotic, for sure...there really isn't any better word to describe it.  Thanks for the reply...anytime I can help in "traveling," then I have accomplished something...thanks!!

Jan:  hey lady...I knew you'd be surprised to see me here...your mind needs the stimulation, eh??  all I can say is CC Lake...how's that??  no, it's not ocean, but it's a semi-close second?  maybe?  but anyway...and, sorry, not gonna humor ya on the schwimmin' part...thanks J, for your always encouraging comments  

ratleader:  thanks for the reply, and I'm glad I could help you see things in another light...glad you liked it!

Martie:  thanks for stopping by...good to see you too...yes, the ocean...don't get me started  

Midnitesun:  thank you for the great reply...I am flattered that you will get future enjoyment out of it...thanks so much!!

sp


just a hang-up call and the quiet breathing of our persian we call cajun on a wednesday...

[This message has been edited by snowpants (05-27-2003 09:37 PM).]

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

9 posted 2003-05-27 09:58 PM


WHAT??? your not gonna write me Alanis Alliterations???
HMMMP....
FINE...I've been dissed by way cooler people than you

and by the way...
Hows the weather there Dorothy

vlraynes
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...
10 posted 2003-05-27 10:09 PM



Hey there, stranger...good to see you!

I absolutely LOVE this write...it's gorgeous, and
I couldn't help but 'feel' it as I read.
You and your poetry have been missed around here.
Come around more often, okay?

Hugs,
~Vicky

"...until you have read the verse on his heart,
you have not truly met the poet.
~vlraynes

[This message has been edited by vlraynes (05-27-2003 10:10 PM).]

snowpants
Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061
KS
11 posted 2003-05-27 10:57 PM


Jan:  and this surprises you??  c'mon...you know me better than that by now     anyway, if you're good, maybe I'll THINK about it...actually, after that Dorothy comment, NEVER MIND  

Vicky:  hey...thanks for stopping by...glad you enjoyed it...I appreciate the encouragement!!

sp

just a hang-up call and the quiet breathing of our persian we call cajun on a wednesday...

Duncan
Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455

12 posted 2003-05-28 08:46 AM


Good to read you again SP!  
nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
13 posted 2003-05-28 08:53 AM


Reach me in this moment--while the wind is distracted...
Speak to me of the muted sensations for which I’ve been aching,
Because, even walking in the depths of intended serenity,
It is not completely silent--
Your lingering voice and matching expressions
Relentlessly pilot me elsewhere.
I search for a distinct song--
One to appease my thoughts,
Yet one that will not remind me
Of roads that once brought me to you.

I absolutely love this first verse and know exactly  how it feels...seems I have a few songs playing inside me too.

*s (good to see you here)
M

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
14 posted 2003-05-28 08:58 AM



You're home!  You've been gone so long...it's so good to read your thoughtful and tender writings again...

Welcome back, my friend!

Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
15 posted 2003-05-28 09:03 AM


Chris~
Just wonderful to see your word-thoughts here again~

This is mesmerizing~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
16 posted 2003-05-28 05:08 PM


enjoyed
snowpants
Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061
KS
17 posted 2003-05-28 07:20 PM


Duncan:  thanks!  it's good to see you too!

Maureen:  thank you so much for your kind reply...I'm glad you enjoyed and understood it!

Sunshine:  thanks!  it's nice to be back...and quite encouraging to get all of these great replies!  glad you enjoyed...

Marge:  thank you...I'm glad you liked this!

vandana:  thank you for your reply!

sp  

just a hang-up call and the quiet breathing of our persian we call cajun on a wednesday...

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