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Open Poetry #26
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Damned
| Open Poetry #26 |
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Damned |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738
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Chaste-- and grace! I spied her there gathered in her robes of moon among the ancient rocks erode just below foot-flower'd dance bells to hearken puerile impulsive child of whim, I chanced upon seductive sweet perfume. Haste-- too late I spat the wine amazed of poison'd nectar's taste shadows played across the sun excess tantalizing tongue visions formed afore my eye and still I clung to my belief unable to concede her truth that never heaven did exist-- I fell into the dreamless pit. Lambaste-- O sophomoric wretch! the pale priest then appeared to me. Mocking of my God he wore the garments of devout. He curled a finger of accuse, a motion that denied refuse. Commanding in this beckoning I was summoned to the depths of my immortality. Abased-- I bathed in feasted bile-- the knowledge of my own repast that which once I called sustence became the refuse of the pit. And yes, O Death I called for her, and she answered, "Live through this." Tears which once were my release burned a path through skin of cheek revealing in grotesque display all my weary head contained. No. There was not mercy there. The pale priest laughed. He finally voiced the final word of my deny, assault upon my ear-- He bent in wicked lip of curl and whispered to me: "Choice." [This message has been edited by serenity blaze (05-21-2003 01:29 PM).] |
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| © Copyright 2003 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
You tell stories... and touch souls... |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Chaste-- and grace! I spied her there gathered in her robes of moon among the ancient rocks erode just below foot-flower'd dance bells to hearken puerile impulsive child of whim, I chanced upon seductive sweet perfume. Haste-- too late I spat the wine amazed of poison'd nectar's taste shadows played across the sun excess tantalizing tongue visions formed afore my eye and still I clung to my belief unable to concede her truth that never heaven did exist-- I fell into the dreamless pit. ================================== damned? nope....more like damn!!!! have I told you lately that I crave your rhymes divine? Ahhh... ..this is a melancholy masterpiece...shades of Poe and Shakes... your grasp of vocab and rhyme, of poetry overall just blows me mothy mind  I refuse to accept that mankind is so tragically bound to the starless midnight of racism & war that the daybreak of peace can never be reality. |
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Brad Majors 
since 2001-04-03
Posts 2647Georgia |
very nice! |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
serenity The voice of choice rings in my ear Yet still I know not how to steer. Excellent  |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Thank you Sunshine, Jan, Brad and my huggable seymour. And I was just reminded of something Janis Joplin once said. "I don't write songs--I just make 'em up." So if I can paraphrase my apparent sister of self-destruction-- I don't write poems--I just make 'em up. Thanks for reading...love you all! |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
Well, you done made up a fine one here witch. You gets better n' better, ya do! You are wearing yourself...well. ~yeti |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Excellent Serenity! Now..this is one I would love to hear you read aloud!! Brava!! Into my library with this keeper. ~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~ ~Somewhere in my heart I'm always |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
This is an amazing "made up" poem m'dear and so are YOU!  Maree  |
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QjQ Member Elite
since 2003-04-18
Posts 3756U.S.A. |
enjoyedA thought from a stranger is cherished, |
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JingleBear Member
since 2003-05-08
Posts 76Pennsylvania, USA |
Beautiful! |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
If JM would so allow, I would like to echo her reply to your masterpiece! (I know that appears rather lazy of me, but she voiced my sentiments exactly!)  Warm hugs, Linda |
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KristieSue
since 2003-01-31
Posts 1460PA, US |
amazing...simply amazing. I wish I could write with such eloquence... Failure isn't failure if a lesson from it is learned ~ KS |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
What JM said....in spades!! Nicely done Ser... excellent!! |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
 Guess who slept with Poe last night... smiles and thanks. Ya'll are great! |
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brian sites Senior Member
since 2002-06-25
Posts 1475usa |
you are at THAT point wow....this is powerful and yes gothicky too gothicky? sheesh you can do anything you set your mind to |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Yep, Karen, you can do just that....what all the above said. I was off line for a while today, but lookey at what an excellently written "made-up" poem that our sweet little Serenity posted for our eyes and mind to feast upon!! Goodness, I wish I could make-up some as good as this, my friend. Heart hugs to you from me,  Ethel |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
wow! |
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