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kauai
Junior Member

since 2003-05-18

Posts 12

0 posted 2003-05-19 03:29 AM

In with the breeze
Out with the tide,
My secret is out
where can I hide.
I sense a strong pain,
I feel like im driving
down a one way lane.
I sent the dove out
it did not return,
because of this feeling
I cringe and I yearn.
What else can do
I'm so lost right now,
I've tried what I know
and I've lost her somehow.
Did I ever really have her
was she ever really here,
my stomach aches
because of this fear.
It's time to move on
now she'll never know,
the love she could have had
would have been pure as first snow.

"I don't use ?s"

"This is the ish, yall ain't ready for"

QjQ
Member Elite

since 2003-04-18

Posts 3756
U.S.A.

1 posted 2003-05-19 03:32 AM

welcome to pip and you write a nice read!!

Poetry gives us relief, We give poetry reason.

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

2 posted 2003-05-19 03:54 AM

Yeah they don't all work out but its worth a try...and sometimes our expectations are higher than there's which can lead to problems...James

CSKpoet
Senior Member

since 2002-07-12

Posts 845
Island in Paradise

3 posted 2003-05-19 04:09 AM

Hello
nice write to express your feelings...welcome to passions. I shall look forward to your poetry
aloha, Cher

Poetry is:
Passion, imagination and intellect running together.

Aloha with warmest regards, Cheryl Stewart Koomoa

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

4 posted 2003-05-19 04:41 AM

good stuff!

welcome to Passions!

kauai
Junior Member

since 2003-05-18

Posts 12

5 posted 2003-05-19 08:59 AM

Thank you those comments are very incouraging to hear. But right now it's 5:00am and I'm finishing homework for a test in 2 hours, so I'll email everyone later.

[This message has been edited by kauai (05-19-2003 08:59 AM).]

Nan

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-20

Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA

6 posted 2003-05-19 09:10 AM

Welcome to Passions, kauai - This is a lovely piece... And your appreciation for your readers is in turn appreciated by our members...

Please know that our protocol here at PiP isn't one where each comment is expectant of a personal email of thanks. Feel free to do so, of course - All will be pleased - in general, though - Your reply on your own thread is just fine with us...

Again - Welcome - And do well on your test..

littlewing
Member Rara Avis

since 2003-03-02

Posts 9655
New York

7 posted 2003-05-19 09:13 AM

Kauai:

a fresh bleed is always a good start
nice entrance and Welcome to PIP!

(you know - this beautiful garden isle
which bears your name - is the place where
I left half of my own heart)
nice write
you will love it here
xxoo

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